Hey y’all.  Please note that where fantasy position ranks are cited: they were pulled from www.pro-football-reference.com’s NFL Fantasy Rankings. Also note that these are non-PPR rankings.  This list only includes Un-Restricted Free Agents (UFAs), it does not include Exclusive Rights Free Agents (ERFAs) or Antonio Brown (We can rank Tony once we see if his […]

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Get your sausage, juicy sausage, right here! On this week’s Ditka affair, Donkey Teeth and B_Don chat about the LeVeon Bell aftermath, AFC/NFC favorites, and then dive into some film review of Aaron Jones and John Ross. 

Later in the spectacle, the fellas tell you whether to hold the Ditka on Alshon Jeffery, Allen Robinson, Josh Gordon, and Donte Moncrief. And guess who might be the A-hole of the week and possibly the year! Hint: his name rhymes with Flaveon Snell. Sniff the free sausage fumes below: 

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Donkey Teeth rediscovered gushers at Halloween and BraMy gushes about his love for rookie TE, Chris Herndon, on this Erection Day episode of the Ditka Pod. The guys also take a look at some Nick Chubb and Kenny Golladay film, sharing their analysis and expectations for both of these rising stars moving forward.

After the weekly LeVeon Bell check in (where BraMy continues to pray to Football Jesus for Bell’s return), your hosts then dive into a session of Buy the Sausage/Sell the Cheesehead/Hold the Ditka. Find out what to do with Tyler Boyd, Golden Tate, Amari Cooper and Cordarelle Patterson. The guys make 2 new stogie bets for the rest of the season. A battle of tight ends, Chris Herndon vs Kyle Rudolph; and they each take a running back for the Steelers. Suckle the sausage right here:

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What’s this? Can it be? Yes, tis I, Beddict, back from the dead, both metaphorically and literally speaking, as I was recently shocked back to life after keestering (spellcheck wanted this word changed to “racketeering” for context) a bad batch of horse tranquilizers (or is that what they’re supposed to do?). Where have I been all season, you ask (or more likely don’t care)? Well, if you must know, I’ve been searching for my life’s purpose, something to dedicate my life to, something that inspires me…

At one point in time, I believed that writing was my true calling, believing I had the skill to become a known author, but, as per usual there was something holding me back from reaching my full potential, a blockade altering my path to glory yet again. As you sit at work reading this (while you should be working) you think to yourself: “Man, I can’t stand my wife. I wish I could go back in time and take a shot at the Brazilian stripper I met on my bachelor party in Vegas. She really seemed to get me.” Also: “What could possibly stop Tehol Beddict?!?!?! The man has a rocking body, a heart of gold, a slightly above average sized pipe, and a real talent on the key board. If he can’t become successful, who can!?!? WHY? WHY IS THIS WORLD SO CRUEL?!” The truth is, I’ve always given up on things too early, finding some excuse or reason to quit. Some would call this a fear or failure, some would call it laziness.

I’m sure many of you have experienced the same, or I don’t know, maybe you don’t have talent of any sort…and, errrr, that’s ok too… :-( …I guess what I’m trying to say here is, we all must dig deep within ourselves to become that person we were meant to be, to use the talents bestowed upon us by the Elder Gods. I’ve wasted many of the prime years of my life, but don’t intend on continuing to do so. Of course, we never intend to be utter failures in all aspects of life, so maybe I’m destined for a life of misery and despair. Say one thing for Tehol Beddict, say he’s probably f*cked.

Oh, wait, is this a football column? Below are my thoughts on a few stories I find interesting in the NFL at the midway point of the season. Take Heed!

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OPE! As we say here in the Midwest. I almost forgot to turn in my week 8 rankings for your Wednesday morning viewing pleasure. I found time in between dipping fried foods in buttermilk ranch and harvesting corn and soybeans to give you what I have for this week. 

With the trade deadline coming up, weekly rankings could get rather interesting in the next couple of weeks. We already have Amari Cooper moving to Dallas from Oakland and that will be a wait and see kind of thing. At least he has a bye week to work with Prescott and learn the playbook. I view it right now as a pretty lateral move for fantasy football purposes. If the Jaguars want to become relevant again this season, don’t they need a quarterback upgrade? Is somebody willing to pay a hefty price for a Le’Veon Bell rental? We will find out after week 8. Here are this week’s rankings.

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Week 1 is in the books, we are on the heel of the Thursday Night Football Bengals-Ravens game and I couldn’t be more happy. Is there any better time of the year? Before I clicked submit on this piece, we received a beautiful clip of Joe Mixon jogging in to the locker room early in the first quarter with a right knee injury. This will be the freshest handcuff report out on the inter-web. Mixon owners please pick up Giovani Bernard, he is looking fresh out there!

I will not go down a rabbit hole of why you should roster your RB handcuff because I know you are here to scroll straight to the names, that is what I am here to give you. Read my pre-season handcuff article if you are curious. I’ll sum it up for you, SCHEME!

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We made it! We finally made it, it’s the heart of draft season and I couldn’t be more ecstatic. If you’re like me, you’ve been consuming every bit of FF content since the NFL Draft, and have participated in countless mock drafts. Shhh…don’t tell my girlfriend how many mock drafts I’ve completed. By now, you’ve tinkered around with different draft strategies and hopefully you landed on one that will lead you to the promise land. Before it’s too late, I want to make sure you are not forgetting a critical component that can set you up for a slam dunk on draft day– the handcuff.

As a new writer for Razzball.com my main focus will be providing you with a weekly RB handcuff report. I look forward to interacting with you all as the season progresses. Let me know if there is a topic or player you would like me to comment on. Today, we will focus on how handcuffs can impact your overall draft day strategy and give you a couple of the top RB handcuffs. Are you ready? Let’s do this!

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