It was Aaron Rodgers‘ agent—Gabe, not that nice State Farm guy—who contacted the referees Monday morning with his very indecent proposal. “Illegal hands to the face,” Gabe whispered, “and be sure to delete those emails!” Trey Flowers and the Lions were the innocent victims of this elaborate conspiracy, with Flowers erroneously flagged twice in the 4th quarter as the officials gifted the game to the Packers. Final score: Lions 22 – Packers 13 – Refs 10. Anyway, here’s what else I saw Monday night in fantasy football: 

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Drafting your fantasy football team is all about risk management. You want just as many guys with a good statistical pedigree as you do guys that have big upside. Let’s face it, not every 6th-7th round pick with the explosiveness and opportunity to return profit is going to do so. You’re going to draft a flop every now and then, it’s just how this stupid game that we love so much works. The players that I’m writing about today are most likely going to return value, but they probably won’t jump out at you on a week to week basis. These are just solid contributors that you can’t take out of your lineup and they end up helping you get to your goal of making the playoffs and making a run at the title. This is how you take luck out of fantasy football and it’s also a reminder to myself to enforce risk management in my drafts.

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Are you playing in three wide receiver leagues? If you aren’t, what’s wrong with you? Do you not like fantasy points? You must be a fan of the Big Ten style fantasy leagues and grinding out those low scoring victories. I can respect it. I like 3WR formats and if you do too, today is your day for WR rankings! Just like my age, let’s go to the 30’s and beyond.

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The one injury I’m watching most closely this week is Joe Flacco’s. I know he’s only owned in around 20% of leagues, but it’s not him I’m concerned about — it’s Lamar Jackson. The 2016 Heisman winner actually had an even better 2017 than his 2016 and would’ve won the award back to back if it weren’t for the crazy breakout of Baker Mayfield. If you’re a Tom Brady owner looking for a good bye week replacement — keep an eye on the Ravens QB situation. Either way Flacco goes I think a Ravens QB is due for a big game.

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The baseball article I write during the baseball season has a section “Doing Lines In Vegas” but here in NFL season, we’re “Doing Lines With cinthree.” If anyone is willing bet me that Nathan Peterman will outscore the Chicago Bears defense in fantasy points tomorrow, I will take that bet. Peterman’s not going to break 10 and the Bears are probably putting up 12-15 (which makes them a bad play in DFS).

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What’s going on everyone, and welcome to the eighth week of the 2018 NFL season! I hope you guys all had a great Week 8 thanks to some awesome performances from James Conner, Deshaun Watson, Cam Newton, Todd Gurley, Marlon Mack, Mike Evans, Adrian Peterson, Marvin Jones, and Sammy Watkins (of all people!)

Below are my rankings for Week 9, for all scoring systems, so enjoy!

And like always, be sure to check out Rudy’s fantastic premium tools here, and follow myselfMB, and Jay on Twitter.

In the meantime, I’ll be back on Saturday for the ninth edition of my 2018 Start ‘Em, Sit ‘Em series!

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Seriously. I could not wait for Monday Night Football just to listen to the absolute nonsense from Jason Witten and Booger McFarland, the latter of which should be prepared for someone in the crowd to black out and see a table on top of the #BoogerMobile. But despite that disaster of a football game taking place, let’s look back at at some of the action from Sunday’s games…

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Is it not the most awkward damn trolley you’ve ever seen? That it will be on display in Buffalo of all places with a decent chance of vandalism in the forecast for it only makes me more excited for the Pats blowout of the Bills on MNF. While Booger rails against logic and analytics throughout the broadcast and Jason Witten bumbles through introductory 3rd grade math, there is a non-0% chance a member of the #BillsMafia will make a leap of faith from the stands onto the #BoogerMobile. But before that game takes place, there are a couple from the Sunday slate that are worth looking at.

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Welcome back to Target Practice! We have worked our way through the first round before getting into rounds two and three. Now, we can work on rounds four and five. But, before we get to the fourth and fifth rounds, have you joined an RCL League yet? You can win prizes and play against your favorite writers at Razzball. It’s totally free and really fun to play in 12 team leagues against other Razzball enthusiasts. If you want to play against me specifically click here to join. If you think I’m ugly, smell bad, or think my writing is trash but just needed to click on something to avoid connecting with your loved ones, we have plenty of other writers on board as well. Reid, Zach, B-Don, DonkeyTeeth, Rotowan, and Stan Son have all signed up to play this season.

Please, blog, may I have some more?