playercard16_tim-hightower

While everyone is clamoring over Westworld (and for good reason…including our weekly Football Podcast!), a show with a little less fanfare, but just as intriguing of a plot, made its debut last year: The Man in the High Castle. Amazon’s alternate universe time piece won’t get the hype of Westworld, but the premise, the acting and the twists are just as dynamic. Before Season 2 debuts in December, it’s worth the binge.

Binging before December should happen every year. And no, not just through the gluttony of Thanksgiving. The weeks leading up to December are the final week of the fantasy football regular season, and now that we’re officially into November that means we’ve hit the home stretch of making your squad better. Can you recover from 2-6 to make the playoffs? Yep. In 2013 I began 2-6 and then rode Jamaal Charles greatest season to five straight wins for the 7th seed, then three more through the playoffs for the belt. I don’t see Jamaal doing that this year, as he’s visiting the three worst words in sports this week: Dr. James Andrews. But in his stead, There’s a New Chief in Westworld (the other title for this article I almost went with) that you can binge before the playoffs. Or…like last year you can ride a player into December that coincides with a certain Amazon show. From now until early December, it’s more than worth your time to stream The Man in the HighCastletower.

Here are the top targets to, well… target for Week 9!

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Remember me?

Yeah, I’m talking to you.

How ya been? That’s good. Having withdrawals from Fantasy Football? Yeah, I understand that. I am too. But that’s why Viz, Joe MacDonald, Smokey and Ralph, JB Gilpin, and the whole team at Razzball Baseball (and plenty of other Razzball writers from Basketball) are here to help with those withdrawals. Never tried Fantasy Hockey? Soccer? Golf? Check out those guys, because they make it the offseason little easier and a whole lot more enjoyable.

Well, as the Deflate-Gate Court Battle is underway, and the combine a couple days removed, this is the perfect time to reflect on how the season went. And, it has been a very unique, interesting, awful, sad, awesome, complicated and happy year. We have had ups and downs, injuries, great sleepers and Andrew Luck.

On a legitimate note, this will be the first article of two where I will break down the season to see what we did right, and what did wrong. The first one will be titled, Things I’ve Learned While Barely Writing About Daily Fantasy Football, which will the the lighter of the two, and the second will be titled Things I’ve Learned About While Playing Daily Fantasy Football, which will be a more in-depth, factual article about what I’ve learned, and how to implement these things into the 2016 season.

And on that note, let’s get started…

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It's gonna be a long year for these Cowboys...

No game in London this week? Well, there goes my willingness to watch a football-like product today… Instead, we’ll have to deal with intriguing match-ups and, well, not so intriguing ones. Your typical Sunday in the NFL I suppose, unlike Thursday and Monday, which are normally intriguing match-ups that end up with not so intriguing games. (INTRIGUING!) If there was one game to watch, it would probably have to be the 6-1 Packers heading to the Carolinas (both of them I guess?) to face off against the undefeated Panthers. A true test to see if the Panthers, are in fact, real, as all their wins have come against some, well, to stick with today’s theme I guess, less-than-intriguing competition. Living in the NFC South will do that to ya I guess. If there was a second game to watch, it would have to be the Eagles and Cowboys annual opportunity at divisional fisticuffs and NFC East derp. Trust me, a Sunday Night Football game showcasing Sam Bradford and Matt Cassel may sound terrible, but it’ll that good kind of terrible. Like eating Spam. Or watching San Andreas

Rankings have been updated and can be found here.

Join myself and your fellow readers in a special Razzball-only Contest! Buy-in is just $5.00 and the top-12 finishers in a 55-team league are all part of the prize pool! Sign up here!

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What a very interesting week. Big Ben could be out multiple weeks, Latavius Murray had a great game, Ryan Mathews had a great game when DeMarco was out, and Blount-Forced-Trauma was in full effect. And Buffalo took advantage of Miami without even buying a drink or driving her home. C’mon Rex Ryan. Be classy. Just like your coaches when you were representing the Green and White. Wisconsin beat Hawaii 28-0, if I am correct. Star running back Corey Clement is being selfish and needs surgery. He could be out 4-6 weeks, which got me thinking. Good for you, Razzball readers of these weekly articles. You guys don’t need injuries, because every week is like a new season. But you already knew that, because Fanduel never has commercials. This week’s (Starting This Week) Tip of the Cap goes to Oakland CB Charles “Chuck” Woodson. What a game-winning interception he had last Sunday to seal the victory against the Browns. His kids demanded, and he put the team on his back. Good for you Chuck. Oh, and before I forget. I don’t always write about how much I love Carson Palmer week to week. I figured you guys had enough. So just as an FYI, if you can put Carson Palmer in your lineup, put Carson Palmer in your lineup. I may not talk about how much I love Carson Palmer, but I do love Carson Palmer each and every week. I love you Carson Palmer.

New to Daily Fantasy Football? Try out this new free FanDuel’s contest, where half the league is guaranteed to win. (Played on FanDuel before? You can build a team for $5 for a chance of $100,000, part of a one million dollar prize pool!)

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Greetings! What a time to be alive! We’ve all been allowed to witness the glorious gift of the Elder Gods, Tyrod Taylor, make gizzards out of three opposing secondaries. This young legend was COMPLETELY left out of a certain ESPN analyst’s weekly quarterback rankings last week, and I for one believe he deserves to be fired for committing such a despicable act of disgracefulness. After Blake Bortles treated their secondary like a porta-potty the previous week, any respectable man would have to assume Tygod would drop a double-dose of feces on those peasants. I feel like I’m taking crazy pills! What are people not seeing?! This stallion has every skill-set imaginable and should only improve from here on out. I’m a TAD concerned with Taylor not having Watkins and McCoy in the arsenal this week against the Giants, but I believe he’ll make up for that just by taking off and running a lot more. By the way, the Giants are DEAD LAST in the NFL in pass yards given up. Suck that in for a second. Oooohweeee, the Rodfather is a top-5 option this week at QB and a must-own in all formats. If you wanna keep hating, I’ll grant you a front row seat into my induction into the “writers wing” of the NFL Hall of Fame (as long as Jay continues editing my work).

I am Tehol Beddict and this is, Disgrace/Delight! Take heed!

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bigbeninjuryw315

Ben Roethlisberger was forced from yesterday’s game against the Rams when Mark Barron fell onto his leg, bending it awkwardly. While my initial reaction was to breathe a sigh of relief for all the women out there who are mobile enough to out-run a one-legged man, my next reaction was that this looked to be a season-ending leg injury. As of now, the prognosis has gone from leg implosion to ACL injury to MCL sprain, which normally takes around six weeks to recover from. Still, while the news improved throughout the day, this remains a huge blow to not just Roethlisberger, but also to the entire Steelers offense. I doubt Michael Vick ever wanted to start another NFL game again, but here he is, ready to provide clumsy pocket-presence mixed with a canon arm that fires anywhere and everywhere you don’t want it to. So basically a worse Ben Roethlisberger. While Heath Miller probably will stay the same (for now and eternity), Antonio Brown, Markus Wheaton, and Martavis Bryant (when he returns) will likely have some issues to contend with. Le’Veon Bell benefits the most, as check-downs need to go somewhere, and there will be even more emphasis on the Steelers rushing game. That being said, it can be a double-edged sword when defenses start game-planning against such things, so we’ll have to see what kind of magic Offensive Coordinator Todd Haley has ready to go. Haha, Steelers are screwed. But don’t worry, Big Ben’s third leg still works ladies! (Whether you like it or not…)

Here’s what else I saw in Week 3…

New to Daily Fantasy Football? Try out this new free FanDuel’s contest, where half the league is guaranteed to win. (Played on FanDuel before? You can build a team for $5 for a chance of $100,000, part of a one million dollar prize pool!)

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I think I have an obsession with stats, and I’m not sure if it is a good thing or a sickness. Every time I look at the numbers, I see more numbers. I’m currently in the early stages of beginning to learn about regression analysis. And by early stages, I mean that it’s a topic I’d really like to learn more about. I really should have paid attention in college instead of whatever it was I was doing the few times I actually showed up to class. Back to Fantasy Football. In the preseason, I talked about the upgrades to The Stats Machine (TSM) for this season. One of the biggest changes was the fact that opposing defenses will now be factored into offensive performances. This is still true, but will not go into effect until after Week 3. TSM needs at least three weeks of defensive statistics in order to generate defensive rankings. With that disclaimer out of the way, let’s get to our Week 1 results…

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ROAD-HOUSE

In 1989, James Dalton gave us three simple rules. One, never underestimate your opponent. Expect the unexpected. Two, take it outside. Never start anything inside the bar unless it’s absolutely necessary. And three, be nice. I bet most of you had no idea that Dalton’s first name was actually James. And for those of you that have no idea who Dalton is, shame on you! Close your browser, get yourself a six pack of brewskis and a bottle of Jack and watch Road House. Dalton, portrayed by the late Patrick Swayze, was one of the toughest, ass kicking dudes in movie history. Recruited by the owner of The Double Deuce, a rowdy dive bar in Missouri, Dalton moves from NYC to take over security and help clean up the violence that is destroying the bar. Dalton is a professional “cooler”, or bouncer for those of you less informed readers. Despite being able to handout a beatdown like it’s his job (which it is), Dalton doesn’t actually like violence. He has a degree in philosophy and practices thai chi. This, however, does not keep him from literally ripping Jimmy’s throat out with his bare hands. Bottom line, Road House is one bad ass film. From Jasper, Missouri we travel nearly 650 miles east to Cincinnati. From one Dalton to another. My lineup of waiver wire fodder is led at quarterback by The Red Rifle, aka Andy Dalton. No relation to James.

Here’s the complete lineup…

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Greetings! Totally awesome Thursday Night Football, right? A wretched performance by T-Pain, Bob Kraft’s trout-ass trotting around the field like a prized gelding, the Steelers headsets “malfunctioning”, and of course, GROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK, is all I really took away from a game that was missing what was basically every player I wanted to watch, due to a suspension for smoking that sticky icky. The game went pretty much as I expected, other than D’Angelo treating the Patriots run defense the way my favorite porn star and close friend, Mandingo, treats his co-stars. No sir, I am not sold on the Patriots being a contender this season. My apologies to the mass-holes, who verbally beat me like a piñata each and every day on Twitter for that epic Seattle Seahawks fail in the Super Bowl. Your time is coming. Oh yes, your time is coming (laughs maniacally while coating my naked body in Vaseline). But seriously though, who cares about real football!? This is a fantasy site, ya’ll! Communicating with the Elder Gods is a complicated and somewhat challenging affair; It involves an immense fire pit, sage brush, a quarter oz. of Peyote, a fifth of Everclear, animal sacrifice, and a bit of luck. Even when they accept my summons and pass the peace pipe with me, deciphering their language and riddles is a most difficult thing to accomplish, but I do my utmost, and that is all one can ask of a man such as myself. Below, is what the Elders have foretold for Week 1.

I am Tehol Beddict and this is Start ’em and Sit ’em. Take heed!

You can check out my rankings here, for all your roster needs…

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Greetings! Forgive me I’m not up to date on current sporting events, for Twitter, whom I fully depend on for all news and information, locked my account for a solid 24 hours! Any Quarterbacks get hurt? Did the Bills announce a starter? My life is meaningless without Twitter and the Elder Gods are known to punish me from time to time, usually when I’m riding high, basking in the glory of some incredible accomplishment, like the time I demoralized the Hilton sisters in a game of naked Twister. By demoralized, I mean that I gave both of them the profound type of hickory sticking that would make even the great Ray-J smile upon me like a proud father. Matter of fact, he was there filming it. Sorry, I’m rambling again, reminiscing about the heroic years that were my youth. But seriously, I haven’t been without Twitter for this long since the last time Sky locked me in his basement. Yes, Sky, I know: It puts the lotion on the skin!

Let’s talk quarterbacks, shall we? I am Tehol Beddict, and this is, Disgrace/Delight! Take heed!

Please, blog, may I have some more?