RCL Update, Week 16, Championship Week: This Is The End

If you have been paying attention to me, you might be wondering what I am doing over here with the RCL update. Oh you haven’t noticed my absence? Yeah, you and everyone else. My mom even told me what a lovely post I did last week. She lied to me about reading what wasn’t even there. You see, I had no post… thanks a lot mom! At least you’re supportive… Actually, I was very under the weather, and with it being the final week of the year, I felt doing my flex play post was not where I needed to be. You guys have been bringing a lot of good questions this year and I appreciate all the love. Don’t worry, you can still ask me any questions you want…. football or otherwise.

This is it, this is the end. It’s time to separate the men from the boys, or is it the girls from the women? How about the kids from the oversized kids? Children from the adults? Those that like country music and those that like real music? Okay, I also give Johnny Cash and a few others a free pass, but this new country pop music reminds me of the first time I tried to jump my bike and smashed the family jewels on the crossbar. Now take that pain and replay it every five minutes and you have new “country”. Now that I have finished standing on my musical soapbox, I think I should get to what you are here for. The RCL Update and trophy(s) you can win.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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It Was the Best of Games, It Was the Worst of Games

by: Jay

So, I’ll be honest… I’m not quite sure if what I saw last night was an okay game or a boring one. True, we are talking about a prime time game that featured a then 2-12 Titans team vs. their ultimate mirror universe nemesis, the also 2-12 Jaguars. Let’s just say if they figured out how to include both the Raiders and Buccaneers on the field at the same time (why isn’t this a thing?), I would have fainted. And while there was some subtle competency from Charile Whitehurst (perhaps trying to grab the attention of Washington) at the beginning of the game, driving 12 plays and 84 yards for a touchdown, the game kinda settled into a mix of “gee, this seems like a good time to try heroin” to “I was promised derp! Where is the derp?” So, in the end, there was a mildly entertaining game between two teams that kinda stink. Which, I guess seems fitting for the end of Thursday Night Football this year, in that, this was probably a top-5 game for them this season. Scary, I know. So… with a Jaguars win and a Titans loss, the resounding takeaway probably is: YOUR MOVE JETS.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Disgraces and Delights, Week 16: Dez Bryant, the Modern Day William Wallace

December 18, 2014 | 2014 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Buy/Sell | 11 Comments

by: LT Murray IV

Beddict: Sons of Razzball, I am Tehol Beddict.

Razzball Reader: But Tehol Beddict is seven feet tall!

Beddict: Yes, I’ve heard. He has an ass like Hercules, kills men and women in fantasy football by the hundreds, and if he were here, he’d consume our opponents with fireballs from his eyes and bolts of lightning from his arse. I AM TEHOL BEDDICT. And I see a whole army of my readers, here in defiance of coming out a loser this week. You have come to play with these Elder God blessed athletes, and ye are blessed in the same fashion. What will you do with your chosen soldiers? Will you fight?

VETERAN Razzballer: Fight? Against that? No, we will run, and we will start preparing for our fantasy baseball dynasty leagues.

Beddict: Aye, fight and you may lose in embarrassing fashion. Run and you’ll at least have made it the finals and kept some minimal amount self respect– at least for a while. And dying in your beds many years from now, would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that for one chance, just one chance to come back here and tell your opponents that they may have boned your wife/husband before you married them, but they’ll never take your FANTASY TITLE?!

I am Tehol Beddict and this is Disgrace/Delight. Take Heed!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Streamers, Week 16: Last Call

December 18, 2014 | 2014 Fantasy Football, Roster Strategy | 6 Comments

by: Nico

Good afternoon to my very few dedicated followers. I regret to inform you that this will be my last streamer post of the year… I hope that I have steered you in the right direction, more often than not, during the course of the season. This is not a time for sadness, but a time for rejoicing. For the closing of the fantasy football season summons the beginning of the fantasy baseball season, in which Grey will entertain us with his daily quips. It’s just around the corner, folks, and many sleepers have already been posted, so get yourself over to the baseball page immediately! Also, thanks to all the commenters for your input this season. It’s been fun. Don’t hesitate to connect with me on Twitter either. Anywho, we’re here for football, so luckily, that’s what I’m going to give you. Championship Week streamers here we come:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

IDP Rankings, Week 16: Keep It Simple

December 18, 2014 | 2014 Fantasy Football, IDP Report | 16 Comments

by: Kevin Kumpf

2014 In-Season Accuracy: 57.0% (3rd out of 20 Experts, 58.4% Highest, 48.1% Lowest).

If you’re still reading these posts, you either made your Championship game, play in an ill-advised 17-week league, or spend far too much time thinking about the intricacies of IDP fantasy football. Regardless of your motivations, I congratulate you for making it this far. In a season that has been marked by untimely injuries to highly drafted stars as well as surprising breakouts from previous no-names, it’s been easy to ignore the absolute domination of J.J. Watt. From an IDP perspective, he was the first man off the board in most drafts, so me talking about him every week would be like Jay telling you to start Peyton Manning or Jamaal Charles. But let’s not ignore the fact that Watt has now reeled off a ridiculous three straight seasons as the #1 DL, and he’s put up top 10 overall IDP numbers in that time. Most DLs will have a breakout season, followed by opposing offenses adjusting, performances regressing, etc. If anything, Watt has gotten better.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Rankings, Week 16

December 18, 2014 | 2014 Fantasy Football, 2014 Weekly Rankings | 81 Comments

by: Jay

2014 In-Season Accuracy: 58.30% (26th out of 127 Experts, 60.70% Highest, 50.40% Lowest).

Week 15 Results: 64.10% (24th out of 128 Experts, 68.20% Highest, 53.50% Lowest).

	Accuracy	Rank	Experts	Highest	Lowest	Score +/-	Rank +/-
Week 1	61.80%	22	134	66.10%	48.20%
Week 2	54.00%	35	135	61.30%	42.10%	-7.80%	-13
Week 3	57.40%	88	128	67.10%	44.30%	3.40%	-53
Week 4	56.50%	48	128	61.10%	42.80%	-0.90%	40
Week 5	56.50%	70	131	69.40%	47.00%	0.00%	-22
Week 6	56.30%	27	133	63.10%	41.50%	-0.20%	43
Week 7	59.70%	33	132	64.30%	46.50%	3.40%	-6
Week 8	56.30%	67	130	64.80%	45.20%	-3.40%	-34
Week 9	60.30%	23	131	66.00%	46.10%	4.00%	44
Week 10	57.80%	68	130	66.90%	48.40%	-2.50%	-45
Week 11	52.10%	64	131	67.60%	42.60%	-5.70%	4
Week 12	59.10%	29	129	66.20%	42.40%	7.00%	35
Week 13	58.40%	73	130	71.40%	48.40%	-0.70%	-44
Week 14	56.30%	59	131	63.70%	40.30%	-2.10%	14
Week 15	64.10%	24	128	68.20%	53.50%	7.80%	35
Totals	58.30%	26	127	60.70%	50.40%

And now, your Week 16 Rankings…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Who Are These Guys, Week 16, Un-BEAR-able

December 17, 2014 | 2014 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Buy/Sell | 22 Comments

by: malamoney

There would be no other proper way to begin this rant than by saying the four words that are screaming to be ejected from my mouth. Ef you Jay Cutler! What a bag of dog excrement. I don’t know him personally, and he might be a good dude to slam beers with (doubtful), but as far a quarterbacks are concerned, he can just go away. I’m sick of all the “Jay Cutler is a top quarterback” talk that I’ve heard for the past few seasons. He’s not.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

DraftKings: Randle’s So Cheap, It’s Almost Like Shoplifting

December 17, 2014 | 2014 Fantasy Football, DraftKings | 53 Comments

by: Sky

It seems like so long ago at this point but you remember when Joseph Randle made headlines? No, no silly, not for how he played on the field. It was his shopping for a five finger discount that rose an eyebrow or two. It’s one thing to steal when you’re poor or at least an intriguing item but…underwear and cologne? Do they correlate? Are you trying to tell us something, Randle? Did someone have an accident while at the mall and couldn’t think of a better way to cover it up other than a change and a spray? Did you even wipe? Oh well, bygones. Let’s look at why we’re actually here to talk about Randle. DeMarco Murray’s hand done broked and the likelihood of him starting this week is slim to NOOOOOOOPE. Sorry, had a Lana Kane moment. Again, it may be that by Thursday, we know Randle isn’t even starting but as of right now, I want all the Randle I can handle and at $3,000, I can handle a lot. Heading into Monday Night’s game, only the Saints have given up more fantasy points to opposing RBs over the last four weeks. Yes, that does still look back on the Pats game where Jonas Gray scored 4 but the opponents since haven’t exactly been rushing juggernauts. With how good the Dallas offensive line has been all year, it’s hard to imagine them deviating from what has gotten them to 10-4 just because their lead back is out. If Randle is starting, I wouldn’t go so far as to say he’s a must play but 20+ touch opportunity at a minimum price doesn’t come along very often. Probably locked into most lineups both for cash and tourney, you are either playing with the crowd to exploit other prices or you fight against the current. I won’t hate you either way. Well, at least not about this topic. But enough talk, have at you. Here’s my red hot takes for the week 16 DK slate…

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 team league of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It lets us know that you care!

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Waiver Wired, Week 16: Is Your Team Hitting DeMarco?

December 16, 2014 | 2014 Fantasy Football, Waiver Wire | 19 Comments

by: Andrew Nordmeier

If you’re reading this column, one of the following things must be true:

A. You have a team in the championship game and are looking for an extra edge.

B. You’re trying to figure out how to play the DeMarco Murray situation.

C. You really love fantasy football.

D. Any combination of the above.

With it being championship week, there aren’t a whole lot of updates that can be made or waiver wire pickups. You should be in a position where your team got through the semifinals okay and you should be able to set your lineup now for the final. Keep in mind we have a Thursday night clunker (TEN vs JAX) and games on Saturday this week too (WSH-PHI; SF-SD), and that will play a little role in how you set things up.

Let’s see what we can figure out for those little extra boosts…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Hit it or Quit it, Week 16: A Couple of Shockers and a Harry Douglas

December 16, 2014 | 2014 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Buy/Sell | 6 Comments

by: Jennifer

Welcome back, my lovelies! Here we are at Week 16 already! Wow, this time has really flown by this season. Okay, maybe not, but I was trying to be positive there for a second. Let’s be honest, this Fantasy Football season has totally blown dead bunnies, with Week 15 being the worst of the worst, well, not for my “Black Widow” Curse anyway. In that regard, Week 15 was like a feast fit for a King…or Queen in this respect. My Fantasy Updates were popping up faster than Welker on Molly with one injury report after another. Concussions and broken bones and severed spines, oh my! I think my curse gained at least 1500 pounds on the man souls it managed to gorge on over the weekend. And, like the true selfless beauty I am, I made sure it feasted on my own rosters, and not yours…well, not all of yours anyway. I am a giver as much as a taker. It’s all about balance. Most of you are in the same position as me right now, and it is not a pretty one. We are forced to look at fifth and sixth stringers and we’ve had to dig so deep in depth charts that we are close to striking oil or finding some old dinosaur bones or something. Whatever it may be, one thing is for certain, fantasy football is a game of chance, plain and simple, just like dating. So, let’s cruise the fantasy football version of match.com, see what rejects are left for us to pick up, so that we can continue to limp those hoopties into Week 16, and, by the grace of God, possibly a playoff victory. Get in, sit down, strap up, and hold on, my lovelies, it’s time for Hit it or Quit it, Week 16.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

KC’s Review, Week 15: I Hate This Part

December 16, 2014 | 2014 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Buy/Sell |

by: KC

I hate goodbyes. I hate when Sundays end. I hate when I hear Carrie Underwood singing “You’ve been waiting all week for Sunday Night.” No, not because she is hotter than I am, or I am jealous of her perfect legs. I hate it because Sunday night signifies the end of the weekend and the end of my fantasy football game. Okay, I am being melodramatic; I still have Monday night to watch football. But by the time Sunday night comes, I already know if I won or lost. And so of course, yesterday I already had that same feeling, and it wasn’t good. So let’s make it into a metaphor… it’s the “Sunday night” of the fantasy football season for many of us, where most of the football games are behind us, and we are holding on to the last two weeks of fantasy land, the Monday night of the season.

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Competent Saints or Just Terrible Bears? Yes.

December 16, 2014 | 2014 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Daily Notes | 23 Comments

by: Jay

The continuing saga of the dumpster fire (outside an abortion clinic) known as the NFC South surely has captivated all of us here at Razzball (I’m pretty sure it’s about 78% of the content I’ve been producing the last month), and, what I would expect to be the entire nation. Some men just want to watch the world burn. And we are those men. And our world are the Saints (6-8), Panthers (5-8), Falcons (5-9), and the Buccaneers (2-12). Remember, this division features three teams vying for a playoff spot and four teams vying for a top-10 draft position. That doesn’t even seem mathematically possible. So with that in mind, what’s a better prime-time event than to pair up a team from this division to go against the hapless Bears? With an immensely disappointing year, Marc Trestman, Jay Cutler, and the Bears switch from the cover two to the cover none defensive scheme have all been at the center of blame. And yet, they would have been vying for a home playoff game last night if they were in the NFC South. I’m not sure if that should make them laugh or cry. While the game started out derpy, it soon settled into an ugly and boring one-sided game. Perhaps the perfect teaser for Thursday Night Football, which features the Titans and Jaguars. Which will make me feature Jameson in my mouth. More like whiskey-boarding, amiright folks?

Please, blog, may I have some more?