by: Josh Carey
Welcome to Bet the Farm, Razzball’s weekly NFL wagering contest. We’re back for our second season and ready to take you on over the course of 17 weeks of NFL play. For those new to the game, here are the rules: You start with $1,000 in contest money to make wagers with. You may join […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: Sky
What’s the most important rule to the game of Roshambo? Always go first. If you haven’t learned that one yet, talk with a friend about playing and ask to go second. You’ll learn quickly. Wanna know what else you can learn quickly? That the Chargers defense isn’t very good in the secondary. Wanna know how bad they’ve been? First off, they’ve given up the most passing yards to opposing teams this year with 1,022. Yes, they’re beating out the Eagles and the Redskins in that race to the bottom stat so far. Hard to believe, but they actually gave up a near 300 yard passing game to Jake Locker at 299. Locker has 572 total passing yards on the year including that game. You do the math and you’ll find the anomaly pretty quickly there. So for this reason and for A-Rod and Cam out on bye weeks, I have Tony Romo as my third best QB right behind Brees. I don’t see why he can’t treat his owners to his own 300 yard passing game and, say, 2 or 3 TDs. As they say in San Diego, ‘60% of the time, it works every time’ to which Jaywrong usually responds in Burgundese. Outside of Tony, I’m seeing the ‘you’re crazy’ markers next to my Tannehill and Dalton rankings via ECR. That also applies to my Moreno call but I think he’ll play better rock, paper, scissors this week I guess. Apparently my Chris Givens love never dies either and somehow Rod Streater is gonna blow up this week according to my rankings as well. And apparently I’m the only one who’s figured out that the SF defense hasn’t been good for a while now as I’ve moved them down to ‘take’um or leave’um’ territory down by the Texans. I don’t know what my kickers look like, you’ll have to tell me. I have 1,000 trained mice whom I have picking grains of rice out of a bag with names like ‘Walsh’ and ‘Hartley’ on them. It’s a complicated process but at least it’s a process! More time spent on them than other ‘perts, most likely, to say the least. But enough fluff, on with the show. Here’s your week 4 rankings for the 2013 Fantasy Football Season…
Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: Loudon
Poor Nate Burleson. Just when you think he’s going to be a consistent fantasy producer, he goes and breaks his arm in a car crash. That’s incredibly sad news for him and his fantasy owners, but those of us who have been keeping our fingers crossed for good things from Ryan Broyles have a lot to look forward to. The Bears have not been particularly good covering wide receivers so far this year so look for Broyles to have a great day. Calvin Johnson is, of course, a must start.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: JB Gilpin
Week 3 was such a see-saw for me. Like a Roseanne Barr vs. Vince Wilfork see-saw. On the one hand, my Panthers had probably the most shocking win so far this season after that Giants beat down, especially since the Giants beat us 36-7 last year. That’s a see-saw right there! Then my writer’s league team moved to 3-0. On the flip side, my long-time dynasty league had probably my worst week in over 10 years and my DraftKings picks, well, sorry…
But whilst real life hath few second chances, DraftKings gives you a blank slate, a fresh start, a new set of wings. Because every time Colin Kaepernick sucks it up, an angel loses its wings. I kid Kappy! I was just hoping he would favorite that too…
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Sky
Bruce Campbell has become one of those rare actors where people have simply asked him to play ‘Bruce Campbell’. Very few actors can pull this off and make a career out of it. Only other one that comes to mind right now is Christopher Walken. Can they play dramatic roles? Sure but even while Christopher Walken told you about 5 long years of your daddy wearing his watch up his ass, it was Walken telling you. You reach that stage of caricature only a few times with actors and Bruce Campbell is that guy. He plays the smug, badass hero. I mean, there’s a movie called ‘My Name Is Bruce‘, people. Yes, he plays a smug bad-ass like only Bruce Campbell can. Why all this talk of caricatures and playing yourself? Well, one, I’m quoting Army of Darkness for my title and any chance I get to talk about that movie, I make sure and take advantage of. Two, for all the things that Doug Martin has not been this year – superstar in the stats department – he’s still been the 12th best running back off the board in PPR leagues. Though he’s been minimally involved in the passing to date – only 4 receptions – he’s second in the NFL in rushing yardage. You could say he’s a caricature of a star running back because no one is taking him seriously. He’s just there, producing but not wowing anyone. Oh hey, there’s another 100 total yards of offense from Dougie Fresh. Psssh, big deal, seen that before. You see, he’s been productive but not blow you out of the water productive. Now I know there’s a lot of fears going around Tampa Bay right now. The team is considered on death’s door. But that hasn’t stopped them from keeping Martin involved as he leads the NFL in rushing attempts. As the pundits currently say, Martin’s gonna eat. I don’t even really know what that means but I understand it to be a positive. So check in and see if Martin owners are fed up with his solid but unspectacular performance to date. Then when he goes off at the end of the year you can say, ‘Hail to the King, Baby’. God I love that movie. And Bruce Campbell. In other buy/sell news for 2013 Fantasy Football…
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by: The Guru
Greetings Razzballer’s, before we run down the jammer crammer’s that could save your fantasy season, please join your humble-but-nonetheless-handsome Guru in the Fantasy Hot Tub Time Machine as we take a short spin through the space-time continuum back to the year 1962. *wavy lines wavy lines* What the hell’s going on here? Hey, look out for that iceberg! Oh, it’s 1912, my bad. I’m king of the world! *more wavy lines* I want to welcome you all to the King’s X Cocktail Bar in Oakland, California. Grab a Manhattan and watch as three Mad Men types – Raiders part-owner Wilfred “Bill” Winkenbach, Raiders “public relation” guy Bill Tunnell and reporter Scotty Stirling – create something that will frustrate and anger all of us for the next 50 years…Fantasy Football. Anytime you combine a wealthy owner with a private dick, a headline fabricator and a pitcher of Tom Collins’ “brilliant” ideas are bound to spring up. Thus, that’s how the Greater Oakland Professional Pigskin Prognosticators League turned into this frustrating game we devote more time and energy to than it actually deserves. Now raise a glass to Bill and the boys, lay a few sawbucks on the ’62 Packers and get your fanny perpendiculars back in the hot tub. *yet more wavy lines* It’s time to jam it or cram it.
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: JB Gilpin
Another great week of RCL action has wrapped up, as the undefeated herd thins with fewer 0-loss teams. If you still haven’t taken a gander yet, we’ve got the full interactive 2013-2014 RCL Standings tab up under “Leagues” that shows you how you’re stacking up against your Razzball competitors in your journey to RCL glory.
TOP SCORER: In a slightly down week of scoring across RCLs, Puttin on the Fitz of the Rancho Rajneesh topped the RCL field with 187.84 points and crushing the other 299 teams. Nice work Fitz! Crazy as that is, he even had Daryl Richardson put up a zero in his flex, but with no other double-digit scorers on his bench, he wouldn’t have topped 200 anyway. The Matt Prater game last night shot Fitz into the RCL lead by only 0.22 points! Led by huge weeks from Antonio Brown, DeMarco Murray and Jimmy Graham, all common players on top teams this week, Fitz moves to 2-1 and second in the league. With another big week, ReadOptionForDummies moves into second overall in the RCL standings at 3-0. It should be a tough battle between those two for supremacy atop the Rajneesh!
by: Sky
There are certain things in life you can’t predict. When the market will drop like it did in 2009, when the Middle East will find peace like it did in never, and when we will find out what Foxes say. If you can solve this mystery, Unca Scooge, you might rewrite history or so Ducktales taught us long ago. One thing that history has taught us and that we can predict is that as long as Peyton isn’t too old to throw the football, he’s gonna be a monster. After spending most of the night having as many incompletions as he did touchdowns, Peyton Manning finished with 3 touchdowns on 32/37 passing for 374 passing yards and his first turnover of the season on a sack/fumble combo. Sure, it wasn’t the night of ages like his 7 touchdowns to start the season but with this game in the books, Peyton is now on pace for 4496 passing yards, 64 passing touchdowns and ZERO int. I put that in caps so you didn’t miss it. Manning at 37 has the best receiving crew he’s ever had surrounding him his entire career and he’s taking full advantage at this point. I ranked him in the Matt Ryan tier behind guys like Russell Wilson, RG3 and Cam Newton. Don’t ask, I must’ve been reading too much into the read option. The ‘he can’t keep this pace’ argument isn’t valid. We know that and we’re not expecting it. But could he pass for 50 TDs this year? Very possible. This is a Bronco team on a mission and Peyton is leading the charge. In other 2013 Fantasy Football news…
Please, blog, may I have some more?Oh man, how one single week can change everything! After looking like a team that was toast in another heartbreaking loss, my Carolina Panthers went beast mode on the Giants in the biggest shutout smack down in our team’s history. He Hate Me! So much fun. And with that shot of adrenaline, the entire Razzball Podcast family was healthy and ready for action this week, with Nick and I breaking down action in the NFC and DraftKings, Jaywrong and Nick going over what the H happened to Jay’s Chargers and the rest of the AFC, Murph bringing us the carnage report on this week’s injuries, and Sky telling you who to nab off the wire. Good luck to everyone tonight if your game is hinging on Monday Night Football and good luck in week 4!
Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: Jay
Good tidings everyone and welcome, once again, to this quickly/drunkenly-typed post of one handsome man’s observations of Sunday Night Football. It’s been a few weeks, since I already skipped one post assignment… (Which I probably shouldn’t have, since the football gods gave me this ridiculous match-up to cover instead of the NFC West showdown last week. Which actually wasn’t much of a showdown when you think about it, so I guess there’s that.) So yeah, Chicago and Pittsburgh… Ugh. Can I just write about Breaking Bad instead Sky? Please? Sigh… So, how did I make a game like this watchable? That’s right folks, the answer lies in a newly created section for this series. (To go along with my score and a quick summary of the game, DRUNKEN BULLET POINTS, world famous Razzball player blurb thing-a-ma-jigs, and a wonderful concluding thought.) And what’s that new section? Follow me after the jump and find out…
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Sky
I got a lot of curious looks this week for ranking Cam Newton as my number two QB behind Peyton. Pretty sure I was the only one that ranked him that high. Via FantasyPros, his highest rank was 2 so I guess there COULD be another person just as crazy as me out there, but not moreso. The naysayers said things like ‘The Panthers have looked terrible’ and ‘Cam’s been a bum all year so far’ and ‘You can’t do that on television!’ and other nonsensical senselessness. Well, ok all things true but I’ll say this. For how ‘bad’ the Panthers have looked on offense, the Giants defense has looked like the Invisible Man out there for most of the year. Something had to give and on this Sunday, Cam went HAM on the poor Giants defense, going 15/27 for 223 passing yards, added 45 on the ground and chucked in a total of 4 TDs with one being a rushing TD. I can hear you now saying ‘Is Cam back?’ and all I can say is he’s never really left. Sorry everyone, this is the life of being a Newton owner. He has limited weapons surrounding him unless either LaFell or Ginn step up along side Steve Smith like they did today on a consistent basis. Moving forward, Cam is still Cam and Cam can still go HAM at any given time but this is one of the few times the Panthers have really utilized his wheels as much as they did today. Clearly it was effective and I’m sure Cam and his owners hope this change is here to stay. In other 2013 Fantasy Football news…
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: JB Gilpin
Well, despite it only being a measly three weeks into the season, it feels like every owner is dealing with a handful of questionables in their line-ups this morning – much to the chagrin to those of us wanting to pregame like we’re in college for our noon football game. And to those of us with guys in late games. I mean, c’mon I don’t want to have to watch Chris Berman for three straight hours to get reports on who’s playing! Although, I wouldn’t mind listening to him on commercial breaks…
It’s already gotten into that time of year when you have to make last second decisions based on news reports coming out mere hours before kickoff. Right now, I’m torn on Larry Fitzgerald. Sure everything points to him playing, but is this another Roddy White limited game? I’m moving Fitz down a few pegs. And past Fitz there’s a whole Seattle slew of other guys with question marks we will know more about (but still not enough) as we approach kick-off. That’s why we have the comments section! I’ll be here all morning with my thoughts on your line-up decisions, along with some picks below.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
