R.I.P. Chiefs Season

Well, I guess someone forgot to remind us that Jamaal Charles bi-annual end-of-season injury was due. Looking to go up 24-3 in the third quarter against the Bears, the Chiefs drove into the red zone, and on a seemingly normal (and patented Andy Reid run-up-the-middle with one of the best outside-the-number runners in football) play, Charles twisted his knee moving left to right (as shown above). And that’s the moment the Chiefs season ended. Based off of initial tests, it appears that Charles has suffered a torn RCL in his right knee. And if that wasn’t enough, the Bears were able to mount a comeback and win the game 18-17. If I didn’t know any better, I would say this was probably the Chiefs at their most Chiefiest moment. While many would look to Knile Davis to try and fill in for what was essentially 90% of Kansas City’s offense, Charcandrick (his stripper name, I’m sure) West will look to be Alex Smith’s new check-down artist. Yes, starting 1-4 is pretty bad. And losing your star player who handles the bulk of your offense is devastating. But hey, it could be worse… you could be the Detroit Lions…

Here’s what else I saw this past Sunday in Week 5:

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Odell Beckham Jr. – 7 REC, 121 YDS, 1 TD. The Niners have heard of Beckham, right? They know he’s a receiver for the Giants? I mean, I just thought I’d ask after watching last night’s game…

Anquan Boldin – 8 REC, 107 YDS, 1 TD. I can’t tell if Colin Kaepernick (23/35, 262 YDS, 2 TD and 3 CAR, 23 YDS) is really good at throwing to Boldin specifically, or if Boldin has some kind of new magnet technology inside of his gloves.

Sam Bradford – 32/45, 333 YDS, 2 TD, 2 INT and 1 CAR, 3 YDS. SAM BRADFORD EVERYBODY, OH MY GOD! To allow Bradford to throw for 300 yards, Rob Ryan probably shouldn’t be a D-coordinator at this point in his career. Unless that “D” stands for dinner.

Tom Brady – 20/27, 275 YDS, 2 TD and 2 CAR, 3 YDS, 1 TD. The performance was especially impressive after getting handily dealt with by the Dallas defensive line almost the entire game. Greg Hardy, in his return, had five QB hits and 2 sacks, throwing Brady around like there was a couch covered in guns present.

Drew Brees – 26/43, 335 YDS, 2 TD, 1 INT and 1 CAR, -1 YDS, 2 FUM. There’s obviously something wrong here. Could it be age? Probably. What about his shoulder injury? Yeah, I’m sure that has a lot to do with it. How about the lack of basketball players? That’s most definitely it.

Jamaal Charles – 12 CAR, 58 YDS and 1 REC, 26 YDS. As mentioned in the lede, it looks as though Charles has torn his ACL. There will be a MRI taken later today, but I’m not holding out too much hope. Charcandrick West (7 CAR, 31 YDS and 1 REC, 5 YDS) is a must add in all leagues and formats.

Kirk Cousins – 21/32, 219 YDS, 1 TD, 2 INT and 1 CAR, 1 YDS. In other news, Kirk Cousins still kind of blows. Kirk Cousins: As bad as everyone thought.

Larry Donnell – 6 REC, 35 YDS, 1 TD. Larry Donnell of all people…

Julian Edelman – 4 REC, 120 YDS, 1 TD. ProTip: You just might want to cover Edelman.

Tyler Eifert – 8 REC, 90 YDS, 2 TD. The Seahawks got Eifert’d on. Did you expect any other joke? This is simply a destination with only one route people.

Michael Floyd – 1 REC, 15 YDS. Hmm, a 42 point blowout where John Brown (4 REC, 73 YDS, 1 TD), Larry Fitzgerald (5 REC, 58 YDS, 1 TD), Andre Ellington (3 CAR, 63 YDS, 1 TD) and even Darren Fells (2 REC, 25 YDS, 1 TD) are a part of it. DARREN FELLS! And Michael Floyd?… I hope he steps on a lego in the middle of the night.

Nick Foles – 11/30, 141 YDS, 1 TD, 4 INT and 1 CAR, 2 YDS. Nick Foles versus Sam Bradford has been an epic race to the bottom up to yesterday’s point. Advantage Foles for now…

Devonta Freeman – 27 CAR, 153 YDS, 1 TD. Devonta Freeman is what Demarco Murray hopes to be when he grows up. I had mentioned that in previous post’s that this was going to be a telling game for Freeman, as his first two games of the season (where he ran for a total of 43 yards), were against two tough run defenses. Washington was the fifth best run defense in the league before yesterday and Freeman went HAM on it. I simply can no longer deny that he’s now a RB1, and I have no idea how it happened.

Todd Gurley – 30 CAR, 159 YDS. 150+ yards rushing, and they ended up with just 10 points. When did Todd Haley start coaching the Rams?

Ronnie Hillman – 7 CAR, 21 YDS and 1 REC, 5 YDS. C.J. Anderson (11 CAR, 22 YDS and 2 REC, 18 YDS) didn’t fare much better. Wasn’t having a running game the whole selling point on Gary Kubiak?

Josh Huff – 4 REC, 78 YDS, 1 TD. I have no idea who Josh Huff is or how he did this. Only explanation? The Saints have fully made their transition back to the Aints.

I’m just going to go ahead and lump them all together, because Washington’s run game is about as lost as Denver’s. Matt Jones (11 CAR, 20 YDS and 1 REC, 17 YDS), Alfred Morris (8 CAR, 15 YDS), and Chris Thompson (3 CAR, 15 YDS and 6 REC, 33 YDS) are all siphoning fantasy value from each other. It’s clear what their roles are (Jones is the change-of-pace back, Morris is the ground ’em and pound ’em runner, and Thompson is the pass-catcher) but they all suck at it right now. Washington had the most average rushing yards per game, but the ground attack has been nonexistent the past two weeks, and with the Jets coming up… if you own any of them, well, people have turned into evil super villains over less…

Chris Johnson – 11 CAR, 103 YDS. “…..” – Jim Caldwell.

Eli Manning – 41/54, 441 YDS, 3 TD, 1 INT and 1 CAR, 11 YDS. I had mentioned in last nights live thread that the SNF match-up was definitely flex-able, but I forgot that sometimes something amazing can happen when a sh*t team and an average one that plays down to the competition meet for three hours. I’ll let you guys decide which one is which, but Manning certainly looked like vintage Manning. The other Manning. From five years ago.

Peyton Manning – 22/35, 266 YDS, 2 INT. I was wondering what the Broncos would be like without Manning and now I know. Honestly, it feels weird that Manning continues to show that he’s a huge liability for this team. Usually he’s just a huge forehead.

Ryan Mathews – 8 CAR, 73 YDS, 1 TD and 3 REC, 23 YDS. Playing DeMarco Murray? Or maybe you’re playing Darren Sproles (5 CAR, 27 YDS and 1 REC, 10 YDS)? Touchdown Matthews!

Josh McCown – 36/51, 457 YDS, 2 TD and 3 CAR, 12 YDS, 1 TD. It’s sad, because on a football team of only McCowns, Luke McCown would still be the backup quarterback…

DeMarco Murray – 20 CAR, 83 YDS, 1 TD and 7 REC, 37 YDS. DeMarco did a thing! He basically octupled his season totals in one game… that’s got to count for something, as sad as it is.

Latavius Murray – 13 CAR, 39 YDS and 3 REC, 18 YDS. I could have told you this has been a five year average for all of Oakland’d running backs and it’d be believable.

Allen Robinson – 5 REC, 116 YDS, 1 TD. Buccaneers Antibiotics: Mandatory. Buccaneers Defense: Optional.

Tyrod Taylor – 10/17, 109 YDS, 1 TD and 8 CAR, 76 YDS, 1 TD. The Bills went back to their league-confusing no-point offense of past seasons. But it’s nothing new for Rex Ryan. His strategy with offense is that it is something that must be stopped. Unfortunately, that also applies to his own offense.

Thomas Rawls – 23 CAR, 169 YDS, 1 TD. Wasn’t it supposed to be Christine Michael (1 CAR, 6 YDS) doing this right now? He’s a clear RB2 until Marshawn Lynch eats enough Skittles to recover from a pulled hamstring.

Matt Ryan – 24/42, 254 YDS, 2 INT and 3 CAR, 20 YDS, 1 FUM. Matty Ice? More like Shatty Ice, amirght?

Bishop Sankey – 7 CAR, 20 YDS and 3 REC, 23 YDS. I refuse to believe that Sankey is a good back and he seems to be agreeing with me.

Willie Snead – 6 REC, 141 YDS. I’m pretty sure he was named after a DC comic book villain. Going into the season, you’d think Brandon Coleman would emerge, but if you look at the snap counts of their last four games before yesterday, Coleman’s goes like: 58-41-33-19, while Snead’s goes like: 18-39-43-48. Seems pretty obvious who’s the WR2 on this team going forward.

Matthew Stafford – 20/32, 188 YDS, 1 TD, 3 INT and 1 CAR, 2 YDS. At least Detroit can only TIE being the worst team in franchise history this season. On a plus note, I’ve noticed that Stafford has become a lot better tackler over his career. Guess all that in-game practice really pays off. Regardless, Stafford was benched for Dan Orlovsky, but I wouldn’t read too much into it. They were down by 28 with 20 minutes to go and looked pretty banged up.

Shane Vereen – 5 CAR, 24 YDS and 8 REC, 86 YDS, 1 TD. There aren’t more than four San Francisco defenders who had ever heard of Shane Vereen, that’s what I got from last night’s game.

Brandon Weeden – 26/39, 188 YDS, 1 INT and 3 CAR, 18 YDS. Brandon Weeden always has a look on his face like he just wandered out of the woods after having been lost for six days. I mean, at this point, you have to start Matt Cassel, right? Sure, you’re essentially trying to go from the Titanic to the Hindenburg… but still. All I know is, if I were Tony Romo, I’d be asking for a raise.

Roddy White – 2 REC, 23 YDS. Well, at least we got a Roddy sighting with two catches. It’s only been three weeks since we last heard of you.

Marquess Wilson – 6 REC, 85 YDS, 1 TD. For about ten minutes a couple years ago, the Bears had one of the best receiving corps in the league. Now, POOF, all gone. Maybe getting rid of Brandon Marshall and Brandon Marshall for nothing might’ve been a bad move? And don’t forget Brandon Marshall…

Russell Wilson – 15/23, 213 YDS, 1 TD, 1 INT and 3 CAR, 21 YDS. Where’s your God now Russell?

Kendall Wright – 3 REC, 29 YDS and 1 CAR, 1 YDS. Isn’t Wright their number one receiver? THIS WHY I DON’T WATCH YOU TITANS!

 

Final Thought