Is it not the most awkward damn trolley you’ve ever seen? That it will be on display in Buffalo of all places with a decent chance of vandalism in the forecast for it only makes me more excited for the Pats blowout of the Bills on MNF. While Booger rails against logic and analytics throughout the broadcast and Jason Witten bumbles through introductory 3rd grade math, there is a non-0% chance a member of the #BillsMafia will make a leap of faith from the stands onto the #BoogerMobile. But before that game takes place, there are a couple from the Sunday slate that are worth looking at.Please, blog, may I have some more?
See what I did there for you Red Sox fans?
Enough baseball. Back to the NFL where my Buffalo Bills put on a truly deplorable performance on all sides of the football. The worst part might be that it wasn’t the worst performance of the week (Looking at you Arizona Cardinals).Please, blog, may I have some more?
Hello everyone, and welcome to another Wednesday, Rankings Day! Hopefully you guys had a great Week 7 filled with fantasy goodness, food, family and most importantly, our articles and projections. It’s crazy to think we are almost at the halfway point of the NFL season, but I just wanted to let you guys know how much we appreciate your readership. I really do love it when you guys love what we do!
Alright, enough chatter, let’s get to Week 8!Please, blog, may I have some more?
Week 3 was a crazy, crazy week. Thanks Trump! I kidd. Blake Bortles, Case Keenum, and Eli Manning all threw for at least three touchdowns, with Bortles throwing four! The Jets dominated. It gets crazier, though. Eight of the games on Sunday had the road teams as favorites. The Jaguars, Colts, Bears, Jets, Bills, and Redskins all took care of business at home. Bow wow wow yipee yo yipee ya! Home dogs! The Lions should have won and the Chargers…well, just scroll down to the recap of that game and all will become clear.
The 2017-2018 Razzball Commenter Leagues for Basketball are now open. Get more info and join here!Please, blog, may I have some more?
Around noon eastern time today, I was enjoying my life. It was another day, and I had a delicious lunch consisting of a [email protected] and a granola bar. Pretty great. Matt Bowe (make sure to wish my man a Happy Birthday!) and I were talking about Joe Flacco’s broken back, and everything was going according to plan. It was going to be a normal Friday.
And then from around 12-12:15, it all went to crap. It was confirmed that Ezekiel Elliot was going to be suspended for 6 games. So I began writing about that. But then, Sammy Watkins got traded to the Los Angeles Rams. Okay, no biggie, just write two seperate pieces about it. But then, Jordan Matthews got traded to Buffalo. So screw it, we’re going to talk about all of these moves now.
I really hope Adam Schefter’s phone didn’t get hacked.Please, blog, may I have some more?
I had always thought that spreading the sport of football to Great Britain was seemingly a waste of time. Finally, I can say that the NFL agrees with me. By sending the Jets and Dolphins to London it almost assuredly guarantees that the NFL will spread like frozen butter. Yes, that’s the best I could come up with. On top of having to wake up earlier than normal to start watching football (first world problems), we also have our first bye week to contend with, losing such powerhouse franchises like the Patriots and, uh… the Titans (THEY ARE THE BESTEST FRANCHISE EVER) this weekend. However, there are still some intriguing Early Game match-ups, including the Giants vs. Bills, and Derpfest 2015: Eagles vs. Washington. There’s also a Raiders vs. Bears game, just in case you needed more “stabbing your eyes with the nearest sharp object” in your life. So what I’m basically saying is, my alcohol consumption will be beginning at 9:30 A.M. EDT today. Thanks NFL!
Rankings have been updated for today’s game and you can find them here.
New to Daily Fantasy Football? Try out this new free FanDuel’s contest, where half the league is guaranteed to win. (Played on FanDuel before? You can build a team for $5 for a chance of $100,000, part of a one million dollar prize pool!)Please, blog, may I have some more?
The season is now in full swing, with the first Sunday of football for 2015 season bringing us a fantastic slate of games. Do you want action? Do you want drama? Do you want romance? I WANT ALL OF THESE THINGS. Well, then I present to you the Browns versus the Jets. Haha, just kidding… but this is Week 1… I wouldn’t have really minded that being the premier match-up… well, for at least a few minutes. Honestly, what can you say about Jets that would excite anyone? And what can you say about that Browns that hasn’t already been said about Iraq? Nada, to use a parlance of our times. But there are some actual marquee match-ups this Sunday morning, including, but not limited to the Bears hosting the Packers, the newly revamped Bills facing off against the Colts, and a battle of cats between the Panthers and Jaguars. Then there’s an interesting NFC West match-up involving the Seahawks and Rams, which I’m sure will include Pete Carroll smacking his jaw like a guy who just did coke after being clean for 20 years…
Our rankings have been updated for today’s games and can be found here.
New to Daily Fantasy Football? I am too! I’m trying out this new free FanDuel’s contest, where half the league is guaranteed to win. If you want, you can join up with me! (Played FanDuel before? You can build a team for $5 for a chance of $100,000, part of a one million dollar prize pool!)Please, blog, may I have some more?
After a knock down, drag out battle with the ‘hawks, everyone thought ‘hey, Cam Newton at home against New Orleans, a team with a weak secondary? He should destroy’um!’ In the famous last words to twitter…WELP. Yeah, there have been very few ‘wow’ type plays from Cam over the last couple of weeks. You could say he’s gone from ‘Cam wow’ to ‘sham wow’ but that would be such a blatant abuse of the pun world just to sneak in a Vince remix, I’d like to think I’m above that. What? Who put that link there! I’m appalled! But since it’s there already there…I mean, why remove it now, you know? In reality, nothing new has happened for Cam to make me excited about him this week vs what he dealt with last week. He’s still getting a great set up for a potential big game against an Eagles secondary that ranks near the bottom in most fantasy categories for points against when it comes to opposing QBs. Well, I would say the main difference is that it’s not on Thursday Night…yeah, I am one of those guys who still thinks TNF sometimes gives us more WTF than the regular Sunday/Monday tilt. It changes the dynamics of prep, of healing, of approach in general. Some teams are good at it, some ain’t. We’ll put Cam and company under the ‘can’t’ for this argument. After the week and a half off leading up to this Sunday, I think Newton and crew come out swinging. The best part is, the Panthers defense is still a mess so the game should stay competitive and give Cam a shot at that elusive 300/100 double bonus dip we all want and love. Of course, if he can just pass for 300 and rush for 50 and add 3 TDs in there, we’ll all be happy, right? Right. So now that we’ve got that opening settled let’s start working towards a closing. Here’s my hot takes for the week 10 DK slate…
New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 team league of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It lets us know that you care!Please, blog, may I have some more?
I thought trading away Percy Harvin was going to solve all your problems? Well, I guess trading away one of your best weapons doesn’t exactly solve terrible play-calling, subpar offensive line play, and very un-special teams play. So, despite the faulty narrative that I’m sure will be thrown about, here we are, CONDITION CRIMSON RED, also the color of Tom Coughlin’s face. As was alluded to early yesterday, imagining an outcome such as this was a fools errand, but it wouldn’t have been the craziest thing to think that the Rams could pull off the upset. And while it took wild and boner inducing events (which is also my pet name for your mom) to take place, the impossible was suddenly possible, and the 2013 Super Bowl champions are now 3-3. Said events (we’ll call them “Cialis”) included a hilarious punt return where Tavon Austin lined up on the left side of the field for the return, and acted like he was about to catch the ball, which drew in the entire Seahawks special teams unit, cameraman in full tow, and then this happened…
Later in the game, with Seattle needing a big stop for another chance at the win, Tre Mason broke through for a first down on 3rd-and-1, icing the game right then and there, until he was stripped. The ball bounced forward, was covered by a Rams lineman, only to pop out again and be seemingly recovered by Seattle. Replays did show Richard Sherman on top of the ball for a moment, but “technically” there wasn’t enough to overturn the officials call which had rewarded the possession to the Rams. That’s two straight losses for Seattle, a team which is now sitting at .500 on the season. Look on the bright side Seahawks fans. After this third loss, the band wagon crowd should be displeased enough to go away. Not as effective as a meteor, but it’ll have to do.Please, blog, may I have some more?