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I had my first board meeting with the Razzball executives this past week and was it a doozy. If you’re wondering what a meeting with Razzball looks like, it is all very secretive and mysterious. None of our identities are known and we all wear large teddy bear suits. We often get accused of copying the 1998 motion picture The Avengers (no not the Marvel one), but they told me we did it first. At the meeting we addressed how we should refer to the free agent acquisition budget (FAAB) percentages going forth. After two darts in the neck to teddy bears I can only assume were Skorish and JB Barry (neither returned my calls over the weekend), we decided going forth the percentages will still reflect original budget. We would like to thank all who contributed and Reddit for sending their weird bear with the crazy smile. Apparently, he had to pay extra tokens for it and we know this because he just would not shut up about it! Alas, your waivers.

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Is it me or are a lot of guys injured? Normally, I’d have some little cutsie intro to get into the carnage but sheesh, man! I don’t know about you but I’m getting killed out here! I actually sprained my right knee on a fishing boat last weekend and was listed as limited but here I am, dammit.

When I see the players I roster in person someday, I’m gonna tell them: If I can man up and type up a bunch of nonsense about fake football with a ligament injury, well then YOU GOTTA PLAY TOO, YOU BIG BABY!

As you can tell, this has been a tough week. Between my injury, all the injuries on my fantasy teams, and what’s happening to my Raiders… Well, we’ll get into that last part later.

And to add to the prevailing roster chaos we have our first bye week of the year! See you next week Jets, Falcons, 49ers, and Saints!

Let’s segue right into Sunday morning with an Intra-Florida showdown in London.

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Ah, do you smell that in the air? No, it’s not the sweet hoppy smell of the IPAs flowing at Urban Meyer’s Pint House. No, that’s the smell of Football Sunday… and the smell of torn tendons and pulled hammys. That’s gotta hurt! Still probably can’t hurt as bad as I’m sure many of you out there in the ether are with depleted rosters. God bless the poor souls playing Davis Mills this week. You will be in my prayers. 

Anyway, let’s dive into this week’s injury headlines hot off the presses!

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When I last bought a CD, my face was covered in acne and I was rocking an all-maroon sweat suit and some kind of hybrid between a mullet and the infamous pretty boy Bieber-do. The year is unknown, but I strolled into the local pharmacy (this is truly where I bought my blank CDs) and perused the isles for a stack of CD-RWs to burn some Fall Out Boy and Yellowcard onto. Now, as I’m writing this week’s buy/sell column, I can still hear the lyrics, “Dance, dance… We’re falling apart to half time…” echoing in my head. For CeeDee Lamb’s fantasy owners, those lyrics hit at another level this past weekend, as the Cowboys’ star wideout was held without a single catch in the first half of Dallas’ Week 4 game against the Carolina Panthers. Lamb ultimately finished with two catches for just 13 yards, ranking outside of the top-45 fantasy wide receivers for the second-consecutive week. That, my friends, gives us the perfect buy-low window heading into a Week 5 matchup with the Giants. For Lamb, a player who was averaging 12 targets through Week 2 of the campaign and has the luxury of one of the top quarterbacks in the NFL in Dak Prescott at his disposal, it’s nearly impossible to imagine his stock getting any lower at any point this fantasy season. So, yes — in a world where even iPods have become obsolete, I am telling you to go out and buy some CeeDees. As many as you can, and quickly — because there’s no telling how long this product will even be on the shelves. Damn you, corporate America and your painful production delays! We should have never outsourced semiconductors in the first place. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy football:

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We’re catching up on a few things today! First, I updated my Pre-Season Rankings, and I’m just going to give you some quick hits about my concerns about playing time right now. To be honest, we’re in the period of coach speak and “motivational moves,” so I’m not going to overhaul the ranks with every tweet we hear about Jalen Hurts. Then, we’ve got the Hall of Fame game summary! Lastly, I’ll go over my RazzBowl draft and give everybody an idea of how I approached a season-long fantasy draft.

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All season long, we’ve been grinding through the top-60 rest of season running backs. There has been a lot of turnover, an excess of movement both in and outside of the top-24, and a heck of a lot of injuries and COVID-19 to navigate around — both in the fantasy realm and the real world. But, alas, we’ve finally made it to Week 14. Hopefully, for many of you, this means the start of a successful playoff run, as Weeks 14-16 is when the vast majority of fantasy playoffs occur. For this very reason, I find myself feeling sentimental as I write this. At times, I led you stray, and at others, I did my job well. Now, as we leave the regular season behind and enter the postseason threshold, I have the opportunity to provide you with one last set of running back rankings as it relates to the 2020 season. In this final installment, I’ll be focusing on the set of matchups each running back faces over the next three weeks, as I’ve replaced the previous “bye” week component in the rankings with a look at each respective player’s “upcoming schedule.” And before you ask, yes — I do have David Montgomery ranked as a top-10 rest of season, fantasy playoff run option for that very reason, among others.

But before we get to the rest of that top 10, let’s take one final, albeit emotional trip around the league together. Feel free to bring a pack of Kleenex or, if you wish, simply deploy your own makeshift snot sleeve. Personally, I haven’t cried this hard since I said goodbye to my foreign exchange student in 10th grade. It was emotional. We played a lot of ping pong together. To fully appreciate this last ROS top-60 segment, I highly recommend playing the song “I Hope You Dance” by Lee Ann Womack. Blast it from the speakers as you digest the fickle words to follow.

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Five Guys Burgers and Fries and is an American fast-food chain serving…well…hamburgers and fries. They were founded in Virginia by former 1982 NFL MVP (albeit strike-shortened), Mark Moseley, a placekicker for the Philadelphia Eagles, Houston Oilers, Washington NFL Franchise, and Cleveland Browns. Moseley is one of just three non-offensive players in league history to capture the NFL’s Most Valuable Player award. He was one of those straight-on kickers you see in the old films, the last since Dirk Borgognone in 1995 to defy the instep kicking movement.

Mark Moseley earned his MVP by converting 20 of 21 attempts in the ’82 season, a seasonal accuracy record, however, it wasn’t all roses for Moseley. He bounced around the league in his first two seasons, eventually heading back to Texas to install septic systems while practicing his kicking trade with his wife. He worked hard, returned to the league, won that MVP, and is still the Washington NFL franchise leader in points. Not to mention, he nailed it with the burger joint after his career ended. I mean, buckets of peanuts while you wait is just as American vintage as that straight kick.

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My pops wasn’t a man of many words, but when he spoke, he morphed into the Korean E. F. Hutton. Of course, I was a knucklehead for most of my life, so the words didn’t register with me until much later. I’m a stupid, stupid man. Regardless, one phrase that did always stick with me was, “Potential don’t mean s@#!” He wasn’t saying that it was worthless, only that hard work and actual productivity trumped it. I think about that phrase often when it comes to fantasy football, especially when it comes to incoming rookies. We get so hyped, by either the physical gifts or situation, that we prematurely ejaculate all over ourselves. Clyde Edwards-Helaire being drafted by the Kansas City Chiefs in the first round could be the next sticky situation with Damien Williams being the value we should be targeting. Let’s dig in and see what we can uncover.

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The 2020 NFL Draft Combine has come and gone. Here’s what we learned: Henry Ruggs isn’t slow, two large trees were killed in the making of A.J. Dillon’s legs, Jonathan Taylor is THE MAN, and eight large deep dish pizzas (Pequods-only) in three days is too much for any one donkey. So now what? First, I’ll probably need to go to the gym to work off these 30 extra combine-pizza-pounds. But you’re here for fantasy football discussion, not updates on Donkey’s rapidly deteriorating physical and mental health. Well, our 2020 Dynasty and Rookie Rankings are now being populated and updated frequently, and B_Don is plowing thru the film on his 2020 NFL Draft Previews. I went over my top 20 and top 40 dynasty running backs last week and made a couple minor post-combine tweaks once the dust settled (insert Jonathan Taylor eggplant emoji). Anyway, here’s my top 60 running backs for 2020 PPR dynasty football:

Disclaimer: If you’re sensitive to ridiculously high rankings of Kerryon Johnson, don’t scroll too far. 

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