Running backs have the shortest lifespan of all footballers so when you draft one in dynasty, you’re hoping for immediate output. Likewise, when risking an early-round redraft pick on this year’s crop of runners, you’d like to know what to expect. Well lucky for you, that’s exactly what we’re looking at today! We’ll be breaking […]

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Twitter was about to shut down the other night when the world realized that Adam Schefter is not just a media reporter, but a utility for the public. He carries the burden of football newsmaking the same way a lineman — no, not the kind you see in football — wakes up at 2 in the morning during a thunderstorm to raise his bucket to the sky and keep the lights on. Schefter’s tweets keep the social media world afloat, and we thank him for keeping Twitter safe for another night. 

Let’s see what Schefter had for us today [loads Twitter, gets distracted by picture of Grey wearing aviators]. Here we go! Ja’Marr Chase is still out. The frack? I thought I was here for the public good? Who am I supposed to start now? 

Maybe you’re like me and riding the Tyler Boyd train this week. Maybe you’re not like me and have some healthy running backs. Either way, let’s see if we can save your team as the playoffs approach.

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What do you call it when a bunch of teams are on BYE, Christian McCaffrey is traded, and J.K. Dobbins is gonna miss half the year? I dunno. You’re gonna have to speak louder because the sounds of my sobbing are drowning you out. 

Much like our esteemed Thursday Night Football writer Hobbs once wrote, “Fantasy football is nasty, brutish, and short.” Civilization is breaking down at the seams and we’re all in our natural state, foraging for running backs wherever we can find them.

Let’s jump in and see if we can avoid any pitfalls this week. Also, because I’m super nice, I’m going to toss in some quick take analysis on the more significant roster moves.  

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For the next 18 weeks, I have the excruciating enviable duty of summarizing your Sunday NFL games for your fantasy football pleasure. If you’ve been here before: How ya doing? Grab a frappucino (on your own dime) and then sit down and listen to my tales of football glory. If you’ve never been here before: Hey! I’m EverywhereBlair, internet celebrity fantasy sportser and occasional watcher of spooky shows. OK, that’s a truth and a lie — I watch spooky shows every day

The purpose of this article is to recap the fantasy football action and give you some early ideas for add/drops/starts/sits/whatever you want to do in fantasy football. If you have questions, drop them down in the comments. 

New for 2022! Our best friends Jordan Loupe and JB Barry will take over the Razzball YouTube channel on Monday night to give their reactions to Week 1 Fantasy Football. Can’t tolerate my writing? Then tolerate Jordan and JB! Check out the Razzball homepage for the article link, subscribe to the Razzball YouTube channel, or follow Grey on Twitter @Razzball for more information.

For everybody else, let’s jump into the Week 1 Fantasy Football action! 

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There are a lot of things I’ve observed over the last two weeks, such as my coworker’s collection of other people’s hair and the hole in my backyard that a family of armadillos has been digging for at least the past week. These are observations I could have done without and which you need not know, but for the sake of a segue, you were forced to. And no, this isn’t Zoey 101, and no one is getting a free Segway. I would call those sobservations, as they made me sob, and such is not the focus of this post. Today, I am instead introducing the bi-weekly fantasy football Hobbservations column, which I will be releasing throughout the upcoming season to break down some of my biggest takeaways from the gridiron. Since Week 1 is still over one week away, this debut installment includes my major Hobbservations from drafts I have participated in, trends I have noticed in those drafts, player values I am targeting, and notes I have from the back-end of NFL training camps that warrant reiteration. So, forget about that hair collection and the holes which fill our lives, and join me in the first Hobbservations article of the 2022 campaign.

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We have finally reached the end of the slow burn that was the 2021 NFL season, the longest in history, but I am stoked for the playoffs. With the regular season in the books, It’s an opportune time to finish up the top 40. I will be putting out player ranking by position in the weeks to come. Players ranked 26-40 offer a great collection of talent, and a few of these stars will reach the top 25 next season, so this is a good group to get to know.

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I thought this was supposed to be the Van Jefferson and OdB fan club meetup? No? Did we get an NFT of the Steamer? Hey Donkey Teeth, why didn’t you invest in that? These kind of intros are SEO nightmares. On the one hand, Google thinks “Van Jefferson NFT” is super cool but on the other hand…Steamers. We better get into the MNF coverage before this post gets NSFW, but really, nothing could be more on-screen violence than what the 49ers did to the Rams last night. 

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As we move from the half way mark of the season, B_Don has another guest, Steve Paulo, on to discuss week 9. We start with the Arizona Cardinals offense as we wait for word on Kyler Murray and with Chase Edmonds set to miss a few weeks. Next, the 2 talk about a couple of top RBs for the ROS in Joe Mixon and Christian McCaffrey. 

B_Don moves the topic to Steve’s favorite team, the 49ers, as he asks about Brandon Aiyuk, and the 49ers RB situation between Elijah Mitchell and Jeff Wilson. One of the teams that can give both Bears and 49ers fans hope, is the Jets. They have a QB controversy and Elijah Moore may be developing in front of our eyes. We compare Elijah to other WRs for redraft and dynasty. We wrap up with everyone’s favorite segment, A$$hole of the Week! 

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Friends, it’s OK to cry. A lot of us are broken after this week, and — let’s be fair — our fantasy football therapists are going to get a lot of work. Here’s a quick primer of things to say: “I should have started Colt McCoy,” or, “LeVeon Bell daggered my team,” or, “The Jags out-field-goaled the Bills.” I mean, these are the weeks that enrich those contrarian players and line their pockets with enough gold for a season. Let’s check in on the scores and stats that wrecked us in week 9 of fantasy football: 

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As Axl Rose once said:

And when your fears subside

And shadows still remain, oh yeah

I know that you can love me when there’s no one left to blame

So never mind the darkness, we still can find a way

‘Cause nothin’ lasts forever, even cold November rain

We’re in the darkness right now as a football community. Confusion, injuries, controversy, and most strikingly, tragedy. We’re surrounded by it right now and this is already generally a tough spot in “normal” football seasons but it seems obvious this is anything but normal. This has been a real tough one with some big highs and some of the lowest lows in a long time. 

And it’s my job to help guide you, as a fantasy football player, through these lows to succeed at this game we all love. Is the senseless death of a young woman something I want to cover in what should be an entertaining run-over of your roster options for Sunday football? No, of course not but the dice have unfortunately been cast and this is how they’ve fallen and I’d be remiss to ignore the 2000 lb elephant in the room. I’m going to go from here on without some of the sentimentality and just talk football because frankly, as callous as it sounds, that’s what you’re here for and that’s what I get paid patented Razzball Fun Bucks™ (Redeemable at participating Razzball locations) to do. And who really wants to hear me pondering on these deep ethical and moral questions this week have brought about? I spent most of last week’s article talking about the Monster Mash for crying out loud. 

With that being said, let’s jump into it.

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