What’s the difference between Jon Gruden in September and an overripe California-grown tomato? The tomato doesn’t have to put up with Mark Davis for the next seven years, who, coincidentally (or not?), also looks like an overripe tomato — except Davis does for all 12 months of the year. For Gruden, it’s just about a two-month sweet spot, and who can blame him for wanting to get his bronze on to complete that irresistible visor look? From the TV, he looks like he’s yap-yap-yapping from the first whistle to the last, the same way Pete Carroll is chomping at the bit from the moment he comes out of the tunnel.

Both Carroll and Gruden have attractive fantasy running backs at their disposal as they prepare week after week in the form of Chris Carson and Josh Jacobs. They also appear to be staring at pretty hefty fines from the league office after looking somewhat lax with their mask usage during gameplay on Sunday and Monday. No matter how you spin it, the NFL was hit with a plethora of unfortunate story lines in Week 2, with stars on both sides of the ball doing down with seemingly every ailment underneath the moon. That makes my job entering Week 3 of the season as difficult as it’s going to get (*knock on wood, although Gruden’s mid-section as of late Monday night would suffice*), so let’s fast-forward through the pleasantries and get to the ever-controversial top 60 ROS running back rankings. First, let’s take a quick trip around the league via some player news and updates.

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After the week two Bloody Sunday Massacre, I knew it would be tough watching Monday Night Football this week. Anytime my man Darren Waller touched the ball I flinched in anticipation of another torn ACL or high ankle sprain. My standing Tuesday morning appointment with my fantasy football therapist, where I usually just complain about how unlucky I got in the past week’s matchups, will now be used to work thru this post traumatic fantasy stress syndrome. Fortunately, Darren Waller is one player I won’t need to cry about during that session as he destroyed the Saints’ defense with 12 catches for 103 yards and his 1st touchdown—let’s just hope he didn’t injure his back while carrying the Raiders offense. I ranked Big Sexy Waller as my #3 tight end and #36 overall in my 2020 fantasy football rankings so I’m looking pretty smart, as long as you ignore where I ranked Kerryon Johnson and a bunch of other players. Also, don’t ask why I’m required to wear a helmet around my house. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday for fantasy football:

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As the final night of Week 1 of the 2020 NFL season winds to a close, I find myself updating Razzball’s top 60 running back rankings with some unusual sights dancing in front of my eyes. Stephen Gostkowski has missed three kicks and a field goal, Noah Fant looked like the best player on the field in the first half, Corey Davis is shredding the Broncos defense and my dog is licking his butt in the corner of the room as I scream about all of these things. Also on Monday were some unusual running back performances, highlighted by Saquon Barkley’s six-yard game on the ground and a breakout day for Benny Snell of Pittsburgh. Oddly enough, it looked for a little while like we really might see a 50-50 workload split in Denver before Melvin Gordon took over in the fourth quarter. If you’re already losing your mind over realities such as these, it might be a long 16 weeks to follow for you. On the plus side, we’re here to help you navigate the rest of the way with your running backs, as the weekly top 60 picks back up today with some drastic changes including some movement inside the top 10. First, let’s take a quick trip around the league.

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Saturday was a momentus day for NFL contract extensions. It was like a scene from The Oprah Winfrey Show. You get a new contract! You get a new contract! And you, Mr. Fournette, get a signed copy of Oprah’s new book Journey to Beloved! Free money giveaway for everyone but Leonard! It all really started last summer when Jerry Jones bent over and gave Zeke his 30 year, 10 billion dollar contract, completely resetting the fair market value for NFL running backs.

Christian McCaffrey was quick to cash in back in April, followed recently by Joe Mixon, Dalvin Cook and now Alvin Kamara. Rams’ wide receiver Cooper Kupp dipped his paw into the honey pot too, signing a three-year 48 million dollar extension on Saturday. Heck, I even decided to hold out over the weekend and Razzball agreed to meet all of my contract demands by giving me one Chipotle burrito—WITH guac. Now we have another running back who’s sure to want a new contract: Josh Jacobs took 25 carries for 93 yards, 4 catches for 46 yards and 3 touchdowns in the newly minted Vegas Raiders’ opener. By my math, that’s worth at least 800 billion dollars. The legendary Rudy Gamble Pigskinonator (only $17.99 for the entire season) projected Jacobs as the #4 fantasy running back this week, smart bot. Sign up for a 7 day free trial now! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy football:

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Two days, football fans! Two days! That means the 2020 NFL Season will be upon us in a smaller span of time than your average game of cricket. Quicker than your seven round NFL Draft. And much faster than it takes Kirk Cousins to get rid of the ball on a typical pass play. Just two days and we’ll have NFL football. Two days until you get to turn months of research and late-night draft parties into something that actually matters as all the projection slowly turns into production. Today, we’ll begin with the former as I reveal my top 60 running backs heading into week one of the 2020 season. As a general baseline, I’ll be using half-PPR scoring for these rankings. Moving forward, I will continuously update these 60 backs on a weekly basis to provide an up-to-date snapshot at the top options at the position moving forward. Before we get into the actual rankings, here are some highlights from the opening list.

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Andy Behrens of Yahoo joins B_Don and Donkey Teeth on the most recent episode. We ask Andy about some of the NFL news, the Washington football team changing their name, Devonta Freeman’s agent is out, and the Raheem Mostert trade demand.

We then move on to Andy’s #SFBX (Scott Fish Bowl 10) team. Andy is a drafting legend after this one, bringing in a 0.0 draft time for 22 rounds. We ask him about his RB duo of Josh Jacobs and D’Andre Swift, along with his QBs in Lamar Jackson, Tom Brady, and Phillip Rivers.

The guys continue the industry league talk with some #RazzBowl 2 talk. Andy talks about his misses in the inaugural season, and how he will approach it differently this year. We ask him about his FAAB strategy and how he plans to handle COVID/byes/injuries in the year that is 2020. We wrap up by asking Andy whether he has a Howie Kendrick in football. 

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So Zeke caught the Rona? I’m not surprised, that guy is always asking for people to feed him. Just goes to show you how important it is to feed yourself during pandemics, there’s no telling where other people’s hands have been. So depending on who you talk to, this Zeke news means one of three things: 1) there will be no NFL season, 2) Zeke is now the #1 fantasy pick since he has all those glorious antibodies, 3) our lizard rulers are using 5G to control the population size. The clear answer is #3, but the idea of COVID-immunity really solidifies Elliott as #3 in my top 10 running backs for 2020 fantasy football. I need to figure out how to steal some sweet antibodies away from those reptiles on Capital Hill. Update: I just read that humans may never develop immunity to COVID-19. C’mon 2020, throw us a bone! Speaking of bones, here’s my top 20 running backs for 2020 PPR fantasy football:

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In 2019, Razzball as a site fell in love with Darren Waller. It started before he became a player to watch on Hard Knocks in August, but the love only intensified. DonkeyTeeth was one of his biggest proponents in 2019 and he and I probably owned him in every league that we weren’t facing each other in. 

DonkeyTeeth’s love for Darren Waller has carried over into 2020 and we discussed it earlier this week in our football group chat. We even decided to put our money where our mouth is and made a gentleman’s wager. For the price of a Rotowear t-shirt, I took the side of Mark Andrews scoring more fantasy points than Darren Waller in 2020. I’m going to take it a step further. I don’t believe that Darren Waller will live up anywhere near his draft price in 2020. 

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I watched The Match on Sunday featuring Tiger Woods and Peyton Manning battling against Phil Mickelson and Tom Brady. The echo chamber said Tiger had a huge advantage playing at his home course. The echo chamber said Tiger wouldn’t lose two matches in a row to Phil. Turns out the echo chamber sometimes echos for good reason, as the Tiger/Manning duo held off a later charge from Phil and Brady to hoist the Pandemic Cup. But the echo chamber isn’t always right, especially in fantasy football. Remember last years mad chants of David Johnson and Le’Veon Bell as surefire first rounders? And JuJu and OBJ as top 15 draft pick elite WR1s? Well, I’ve stepped outside the echo chamber and into a private padded room to compile my 2020 fantasy football rankings. Over the weekend I gave you my overall top 10 for 2020 fantasy football which were crazy as a pack of unicycle-riding-gorillas. The only echos you’ll find here are the friendly, completely sane, voices inside my head. Anyway, here’s my top 20 for 2020 PPR fantasy football:

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