What’s the difference between Jon Gruden in September and an overripe California-grown tomato? The tomato doesn’t have to put up with Mark Davis for the next seven years, who, coincidentally (or not?), also looks like an overripe tomato — except Davis does for all 12 months of the year. For Gruden, it’s just about a two-month sweet spot, and who can blame him for wanting to get his bronze on to complete that irresistible visor look? From the TV, he looks like he’s yap-yap-yapping from the first whistle to the last, the same way Pete Carroll is chomping at the bit from the moment he comes out of the tunnel.

Both Carroll and Gruden have attractive fantasy running backs at their disposal as they prepare week after week in the form of Chris Carson and Josh Jacobs. They also appear to be staring at pretty hefty fines from the league office after looking somewhat lax with their mask usage during gameplay on Sunday and Monday. No matter how you spin it, the NFL was hit with a plethora of unfortunate story lines in Week 2, with stars on both sides of the ball doing down with seemingly every ailment underneath the moon. That makes my job entering Week 3 of the season as difficult as it’s going to get (*knock on wood, although Gruden’s mid-section as of late Monday night would suffice*), so let’s fast-forward through the pleasantries and get to the ever-controversial top 60 ROS running back rankings. First, let’s take a quick trip around the league via some player news and updates.

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Two nights ago I had a vivid dream. I was cruising down the South Carolina coast on a beautiful summers day, windows open and Katie Perry’s Dark Horse blaring on the speakers. Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye I see an enormous tidal wave towering over me. As I scrambled to roll up the windows, the big kahuna came crashing down on me like something out of an Odell Beckham Jr. fantasy—except less brown and more liquid. Well, I think more liquid, not positive on Odell’s preferred consistency. But next thing I knew I was laying awake in bed, sweat covered, clutching my Kerryon Johnson blow up doll. What did it all mean?

Naturally, like any deranged fantasy football addict, I assumed the dream was forewarning of the impending injury wave set to billow down on all of my fantasy football teams in week 2. Turns out, I misinterpreted all the signs. The vehicle in my dream was actually my week two fantasy opponents, and the colossal wave was Nick Chubb demolishing them with his 22 carries for 124 yards, 1 catch for 9 yards and 2 touchdowns. Kareem Hunt dove into the storm too with 10 carries for 86 yards, 2 catches for 15 yards and 2 touchdowns of his own. I told you in my weekly Thursday Night Football predictions that Chubb would return to full mast . I missed on my prediction of Baker Mayfield leaving at half time to record Progressive commercials, but one for two isn’t bad. Hopefully no one freaked out and traded Chubb away for another, more flaccid back after his poor showing in week one. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy football:

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B_Don and Donkey Teeth are back to discuss the happenings in week 1, some possible situation changes, and go over @Al_FF_Red’s waiver wire article. After we compare our top picks with Boof’s top pickups, we go over some contract talk with Allen Robinson and RBs getting paid. Then, we get into our observations for week 1. 

We start at QB  with Kyler putting up points in week 1. Then, we look at some established QBs that struggled in Carson Wentz, Tom Brady, and Ryan Fitzpatrick and discuss our level of concern on each. 

Next, both hosts admit to being wrong on Clyde Edwards-Helaire. They discuss what takeaways there might be from that match up, and one of the hosts is slightly higher on him than the other. Austin Ekeler and Nick Chubb both disappointed in week 1 and we talk about some realistic expectations for the rest of the season.

The guys start the WR discussion by answering a listener question regarding D.J. Moore. Both of the hosts remain positive on Preston Williams before looking into the Giants WR breakdown. Is it Quintez Cephus time or was it just an adjustment sans Kenny Golladay? 

We wrap up the show on the back end with tight ends. B_Don asks DT if he’s ready to move Andrews into his elite tier at the position. The guys discuss some young TE performances from week 1 and look at the potential for trading and streaming the TE position early in the season as your competitors are scrambling and panicking. 

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Ladies and gentlemen, this isn’t just a trade column. This week mostly won’t be. In the spirit of week 1 overreactions, I want to provide a buy and sell of narratives and performances this week. I can’t think of a better way to celebrate Josh Jacobs being on pace for 48 regular season touchdowns. 

Too often, people get caught up in overreacting to week 1 boxscores without seeing the whole picture, but sometimes the reactions end up being valid. August didn’t give us a preseason to work with so the week 1 sample size is what we have to work with. There were things that every analyst was right and wrong about coming out of week 1, including me. But whether you are heading into week 2 1-0 or 0-1, there is still a ton of football to be played. 

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As the final night of Week 1 of the 2020 NFL season winds to a close, I find myself updating Razzball’s top 60 running back rankings with some unusual sights dancing in front of my eyes. Stephen Gostkowski has missed three kicks and a field goal, Noah Fant looked like the best player on the field in the first half, Corey Davis is shredding the Broncos defense and my dog is licking his butt in the corner of the room as I scream about all of these things. Also on Monday were some unusual running back performances, highlighted by Saquon Barkley’s six-yard game on the ground and a breakout day for Benny Snell of Pittsburgh. Oddly enough, it looked for a little while like we really might see a 50-50 workload split in Denver before Melvin Gordon took over in the fourth quarter. If you’re already losing your mind over realities such as these, it might be a long 16 weeks to follow for you. On the plus side, we’re here to help you navigate the rest of the way with your running backs, as the weekly top 60 picks back up today with some drastic changes including some movement inside the top 10. First, let’s take a quick trip around the league.

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Two days, football fans! Two days! That means the 2020 NFL Season will be upon us in a smaller span of time than your average game of cricket. Quicker than your seven round NFL Draft. And much faster than it takes Kirk Cousins to get rid of the ball on a typical pass play. Just two days and we’ll have NFL football. Two days until you get to turn months of research and late-night draft parties into something that actually matters as all the projection slowly turns into production. Today, we’ll begin with the former as I reveal my top 60 running backs heading into week one of the 2020 season. As a general baseline, I’ll be using half-PPR scoring for these rankings. Moving forward, I will continuously update these 60 backs on a weekly basis to provide an up-to-date snapshot at the top options at the position moving forward. Before we get into the actual rankings, here are some highlights from the opening list.

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Welcome to week 1! The coffee and takes are hot here at Razzball headquarters. Yes, Grey let’s us have coffee in his basement, but only when it’s the regular season. We need caffeine for this hamster wheel and he knows it. But AHHHH, it’s great to have real football back! You know, real football to add up scores for our fake football teams. 

I’ll be writing a buy/sell this season. It may be weekly, it may be bi-weekly. I’ll leave it up to a basis of necessity. I’m also going to be writing the Sunday Primer, putting out weekly rankings, and writing the start/sit column this year. 

Before your season starts, you might be interested in a trade to sure up your roster. This is the sharpest week to get a lot of value. Not everyone in your league may be privy to the upside of the players that they drafted. Your league mates might also be thirsty for early carries while you are playing the long game with your bench spots. Vacation is over! The markets are open! TRADE TRADE TRADE!

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Have you ever seen the show Alone on the History Channel? It’s a wilderness competition to see which contestant is able survive the longest in severe climates with no food and very few supplies. There’s no camera crew, each contest is responsible for filming all their own footage so they’re legit alone out there. A new season just started and *spoiler alert* one of the guys found an old boat which he repurposed into a hot tub by filling it with water and starting a fire underneath the hull. Man’s genius knows no bounds. Point of this tangent is I’m that guy. I’m out here alone in cold, ranking Austin Ekeler, Miles Sanders and Kenyan Drake acres ahead of the rest of the fantasy world. It’s alright though, I’m chilling over here in my homemade boat tub sipping on some juniper tea. Anyway, I went over most of these guys in my overall top 10 for 2020 fantasy football, but I won’t make you click—only click if you really want more nonsense—because here’s my top 10 running backs for 2020 PPR fantasy football with projections:

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When Heath Cummings of CBS Fantasy Sports asked me if I’d be willing to participate in his 20 round industry dynasty superflex startup mock draft, I had to check my schedule. My Kerryon Johnson stalking schedule that is. Between that and working up my 2020 fantasy football rankings I was booked solid. Fortunately, the bushes outside Kerryon’s house are pretty comfortable and I cracked the Johnson’s wifi password months ago. So it was all systems go for this 12 team PPR dynasty superflex startup mock draft, see the full results here. Anyway, here’s the team I came away with:

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The build up to the 2020 NFL Draft was like waiting for Christmas morning as a child, the release of Game of Thrones Season 8 as an adult and the return of Taco Bell’s Nacho Fries as a stoner, all at once. But alas the excitement of the draft has come and gone. Giants fans were left wondering what might have been if their GM figured out how to use a computer, Bears fans were left wondering what it feels like to make a good draft pick and fantasy football fans were left wondering when Donkey Teeth’s 2020 fantasy football rankings would be released. Sorry Giants and fellow Bears fans, I have no answers for you, but fantasy fans you’re in luck. It’s redraft rankings season! All of my 2020 dynasty football rankings have already been released, dissected and judged as terribly inadequate. Anyway, here’s my top 10 for 2020 fantasy football:

Just kidding! Tricked you again! First, I’m contractually obligated to plug my wildly popular new YouTube show called Fantasy Football Malpractice with myself (Dr. Donkey Teeth) and The Boof. Episode two was released earlier this week where we discuss NFL in the COVID Era, drafting for upside and some of our worst takes from 2019. Watch, subscribe, comment and click that thumbs up dealie if you don’t hate us too much!

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