hi-res-183966130-quarterback-cam-newton-of-the-carolina-panthers-warms_crop_north

Hey, wait, where’d all my receivers go?

Why you no like Cam Newton? What did Cam Newton do to you? Be a top-4 overall scorer just last year? A top-5 QB in all three of his NFL seasons? Late round gold in 2011? Why all the hate? Why is Newton being drafted after guys like Cordarrelle Patterson, Shane Vereen, Ray Rice, Jordan Cameron, and Joique Bell? Those are three committee backs, a TE who had a boom early last year and disappeared for another large chunk of it, and a receiver who’s tied to a Matt Cassel run offense. Seriously! I gots mad questions yo! I’ve seen these sorts of players drafted ahead of Newton in almost every draft I’ve done on numerous sites. He’s currently rated 45th overall on ESPN and 54th on Yahoo, and I’ve gotten him in the 7th round a couple times already this year, in 12 team leagues at that. If past performance holds true, It’s safe to say he’ll outperform that draft position.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

2014 Rankings: Top-200 | Top-200 (Half-PPR) |  Top-200 (PPR) | QB | RB | RB (PPR)| WR | WR (PPR) | TE | TE (PPR) | K | DST | IDP Rankings: Top-100 | DL | DB | LB

Well, this is it folks. We are nearing the end of what was a glorious and scrumptious set of weeks going over the bulk of our fantasy rankings. Coincidentally, glorious and scrumptious is how I’m described at most dinner parties. With a hint of lilac and ginger. So I’m basically a hot tea. Hot tea. Hottie. HUUUUUUR. Anyways, you should give me a dollar for these set of rankings. Why? So I can give you some quarters back…? I’m simply on fire here. No, I’m serious. It’s the District and we’re in the unbearable humid stage of summer. So I literally need to stick a fire extinguisher between my thighs to prevent chaffed rashes and combustion. It’s like the forest from Fern Gully down there.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Welcome once again my fantasy friends to the Razzball Lounge. Every year at this time your Razzballin’ scribes gather together in the lounge for Thanksgiving in an effort to avoid the family, complain about our teams, knock back a few and give our thanks to the Fantasy gods on another season well played. It’s just like what the Pilgrims did – without the small pox and post-meal genocide. On this festive day we find our fearless leader Sky in a gravy stained wife-beater hugging the waitress and crying over the loss of his season because he drafted Doug Martin No. 1, “I wanna be your muscle hamster.” *SLAP* Sitting alone in a dark corner JB Gilpin enjoys his pumpkin pie and mutters again and again, “Cam Newton is the MVP, Cam Newton is the MVP.” Over at the jukebox is the one and only J-Foh, dropping quarters and playing “Alice’s Restaurant” for the 10th straight time, “You can get anything you want at…” *bottle smashes above head* Locked in the ladies room the one and only Tehol Beddict asks this pretty lady if she wants to see his giblets, “Whatever happens in the Razzball Lounge stays in the Razzball Lounge, right guys??” And standing here at the pool table is your humble-but-nonetheless-handsome Guru. *closes eye, aims cue, sinks 8-ball off three rails, pulls wishbone from pocket* “Make a wish. It’s time to jam it or cram it.”

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Normally a big game from someone comes early in the day and I circle it, pin it on my 100 %recycled cork board and dictate the rest of my post in pieces here and there throughout but I’m not gonna lie: the Broncos vs Pats game I had circled. I just knew the name would come out of this game. I mean, we had all those stars and great storylines. Wes Welker returning to face his former team. Amendola living up to the hype of trying to replace Wes in New England. Peyton Manning doing his best nihilist impersonation. Gisele rushing onto the field and Tonya Harding’ing Welker also came to mind. But instead, out of all the storylines this game brought to life, it was really center stage for a guy who’s been under-appreciated for what he has meant to his team, been called out on twitter and in general gets no respect. I’m of course talking about Knowshon Moreno, the much maligned starting RB for the Broncos whose emergence started last year when Willis went down with an injury and rolled into this year while all the pundits said Montee Ball would be the star in Denver. And yet, through it all Moreno has put up some very solid fantasy numbers on the year. But I’m taking this second to point out a different part that’s just as important; what he means to his team. Moreno ‘gets it’ and Peyton knows it. He trusts him. When Moreno is out there, Manning knows he’s got a guy who knows the play and will be ready to block if the play changes and where he needs to be to make the team successful. Of course, twitter has been cruel to him but it’s also shed some light here and there as well. And despite the massive fantasy day, tallying 224 rushing yards on 37 carries to go with a TD, Moreno left the stadium in a walking boot and on crutches. I’m pointing all of this out to say it’s not just Moreno owners who should be worried about this injury as it could affect the offense as a whole if he misses significant time. You think I’m being melodramatic up in here? Think back on all those fumbles by Peyton on huge sacks. Guess who was in to pass block? Mmm-hmmm. He’s real football important and because of that his fake football persona is relevant. Montee Ball started the collapse for the Broncos in the second half with a fumble and has had pass pro issues. Ronnie Hillman has been in the inactive dog house since his fumble fiasco at the goal line in the Colts loss. CJ Anderson? Odd if they wanted him involved why they haven’t given him many reps since the Hill demotion. All this to say, Broncos thought it was cold Sunday Night. We might be finding out how warm it is when he’s away. I know, I know, I know, I know, I know…in other news from week 12 of the 2013 Fantasy Football season…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Both Calvin Johnson and A.J. Green are in tough matchups this week, but you’re going to play them anyway. Why? They’re just too talented to bench. Baltimore is incredibly good at protecting against the run, but that won’t stop you from starting Matt Forte will it? Probably not. There are just some players you have to start regardless of their matchup, but that list is pretty short, so here are some players that aren’t on that list.

Steven Jackson has so much potential! After a decent performance in New Orleans week 1, Jackson has been a huge disappointment ever since, thanks to his injury. There are better scenarios ahead, but against a surprisingly decent Tampa Bay run defense, you shouldn’t expect much from him this week. Consider him a low end flex play until next week…when the Saints come marching in.

Please, blog, may I have some more?