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It wasn’t well reported by the mainstream media, but prior to week one Mike Evans gave a sample of his secret family sausage recipe to Jameis Winston. When Winston inserted the mystery meat into his mouth, the funkiness he tasted was beyond words. Jameis was so offended by the foul tasting wiener, he vowed to look to Chris Godwin before Evans on every pass play for two weeks. Then, earlier this week Mike Evans tweaked the family sausage recipe and placed the new wiener into his quarterbacks’ hands. The fresh Evans man meat was so juicy and flavorful, Jameis was addicted!

Needless to say, Winston adjusted his game plan for week three targeting Mike Evans 15 times against the Giants. Evans turned those 15 targets into 8 catches for 190 yards and 3 touchdowns. That must have been some sausage! Anyway, here’s what else I saw in yesterday’s late games for fantasy football:

Kyle Allen – 19/26 for 261 yards and his 1st and 2nd career touchdowns. Have you heard of Wally Pipp? Alright so Cam’s starting job isn’t in jeopardy quite yet but Allen appears more than serviceable running the show in Carolina.

Christian McCaffrey – 24 carries for 154 yards, 3 catches for 54 yards and his 3rd touchdown. CMC approves of the Kyle Allen Era.

Curtis Samuel – 5 catches for 53 yards and his 1st touchdown. Curtis is also happy to have a quarterback who doesn’t throw it eight feet over his head every play.

Greg Olsen – 6 catches for 75 yards and his 1st and 2nd touchdowns. He’s no Darren Waller, but who is? Have you seen Waller with his shirt off?

D.J. Moore – 1 catch for 52 yards, 1 carry for 12 yards and his 1st touchdown. Moore doesn’t appear to be Allen’s first option as he was only targeted twice compared to Samuel and Olsen’s 7 targets each, but at least those two targets didn’t sail eight feet over his head!

Kyler Murray – 30/43 for 173 yards, 8 carries for 69 yards, and his 3rd and 4th touchdowns. Murray also threw 2 interceptions and was sacked 8 times. He’ll be talking more like Bill Murray in Caddyshack soon if the Cardinals don’t start protecting him.

David Johnson – 11 carries for 37 yards, 6 catches for 28 yards and his 3rd touchdown. Some questioned how good this air-raid offense would be for David Johnson’s fantasy value. DJ is cranking the jams so far.

Larry Fitzgerald – 5 catches for 36 yards and his 2nd touchdown. Kyler Murray has revitalized Larry Legend’s fantasy value. Last year it took eight weeks for Fitz to catch his 2nd touchdown. It’s worth noting Christian Kirk (10 catches for 59 yards) had 12 targets in this game as well.

Daniel Jones – 23/36 for 336 yards, 4 carries for 28 yards and his 1st, 2nd, 3rd and 4th career touchdowns (2 rushing). Looks like Eli just lost his job for good. On the plus side, I expect he has a bright future starring in commercials.

Sterling Shepard – 7 catches for 100 yards, 2 carries for 21 yards and his 1st touchdown. Shepard might be the number one beneficiary of the switch to the rookie QB. There’s a chance he’s a top 20 wide receiver now.

Evan Engram – 6 catches for 113 yards and his 2nd touchdown. Eli threw to Engram almost as often as he threw to the opposing defense, so expect Jones to be more of a lateral move for Engram’s fantasy value than anything. Regardless, he should be in the top 5 fantasy tight end discussion every week.

Saquon Barkley – 8 carries for 10 yards and 4 catches for 27 yards before leaving the game with what’s being called a “high ankle sprain” by a bunch of medical amateurs who may have no idea what they’re talking about. Either way, Saquon will likely miss multiple weeks and Wayne Gallman (4 carries for 13 yards) is the add, but I wouldn’t be rushing out to start him.

O.J. Howard – 3 catches for 66 yards. I’m so glad I accidentally drafted O.J. Simpson instead of O.J. Howard. Simpon is literally killing it for me! Several people asked me if they should drop the disappointing Howard last week. Give O.J. another week or two.

Keenan Allen – 13 catches for 189 yard and his 2nd and 3rd touchdowns. Phillip Rivers (31/46 for 318 yards and 2 touchdowns) played the Kel to Keenan in this one. Allen is an easy top 10 wide receiver until he gets hurt, maybe top 5.

Justin Jackson – 5 carries for 26 yards and 4 catches for 4 yards as he had his 2nd touchdown in as many weeks called back due to penalty. What a kick to the groin. Those two touchdowns would have salvaged an otherwise forgettable start to the season. Jackson is still worth a look if he was dropped and you’re running back needy. Just beware, Melvin Gordon will likely return at some point.

Carlos Hyde – 10 carries for 19 yards and his 1st touchdown. I was all ready to admit I whiffed on Hyde and I even had a joke ready about Antonio Brown’s doctor whiffing farts. Then I saw Carlos Hyde’s pathetic 1.9 yards per carry against the Chargers, woof. He is who I thought he was! But Hyde’s receiving the goal line carries in a solid offense, so he still needs to be owned in most leagues.

Jordan Akins – 3 catches for 73 yards and his 1st and 2nd touchdowns. Maybe this is the start of a breakout for the 27 year old Akins, but I’d guess it’s mostly just a blip on the radar. Feel free to ignore for now unless you’re in some sort of 2 tight end or tight end premium league where he was probably already owned anyway.

Mason Rudolph – 14/27 for 174 yards, 4 carries for 15 yards and his 3rd and 4th touchdowns. We profiled Mason Rudolph on the Razzball Fantasy Football Podcast this past week. Rudolph didn’t ruin Christmas this week, but he did almost knocked over the tree in the first half before settling in.

JuJu Smith-Schuster – 3 catches for 81 yards and his 1st touchdown. JuJu’s whole game came on a 76 yard touchdown reception in the 3rd quarter, but it only takes one with a special talent like him. Smith-Schuster will have to trust Rudolph to guide his sleigh into the holidays. Alright, I’m out of Rudolph puns!

Diontae Johnson – 3 catches for 52 yards and his 1st career touchdown. I ranked the 3rd round rookie #16 in my Top 20 Rookies for Redraft a few weeks back when I wrote, “Diontae was reportedly one of the most impressive players in Steelers camp before missing time with leg and hip issues. There were actually whispers of him shooting up to #2 on the depth chart. I don’t trust Donte Moncrief to stay healthy himself, so I expect Johnson to get some run at some point this season. Once he gets his chance, there’s nice upside.” And that’s me quoting me!

Dante Pettis – 4 catches for 20 yards and his 1st touchdown. You grab his legs and I’ll grab his arms, maybe we can hoist him into the trunk without anyone seeing. Wait, he just moved, Pettis is alive! This could be the start of big things for the talented 2nd year wide out who Donkey Teeth drafted and dropped all over the place.

Jeff Wilson – 8 carries for 18 yards and his 3rd and 4th touchdowns. I just wrote about Jeff Wilson in my RazzBowl Revelations: Fargate post. I won’t quote myself again, but here’s the long and short of it: Rudy Gamble is a sorcerer and Jeff Wilson is the 49ers goal line back for the time being.

Teddy Bridgewater – 19/27 for 177 yards, 3 carries for 12 yards and his 1st and 2nd touchdowns. Teddy Two Gloves wasn’t asked to do too much and he delivered impressively on the ask with no turnovers or sacks.

Alvin Kamara – 16 carries for 69 yards, 9 catches for 92 yards and his 1st and 2nd touchdown. There was fear in the fantasy community that Kamara’s value would take a hit while Brees is on the shelf. Turns out the Bridgewater check-down game plan might actually help Kamara’s fantasy value.

Michael Thomas – 5 catches for 54 yards and his 1st touchdown. Unlike Kamara, Thomas’s fantasy value will take at least a minor hit with Teddy Touchdown at the helm. He saw 13 targets each of the first two weeks, but received only 6 targets yesterday. Fortunately one of those was a goal line target which he hauled in. They couldn’t guard Mike.

Tyler Lockett – 11 catches for 159 yards and his 2nd touchdown. There was no locking down Lockett in this massive breakout game. He’s a fringe WR1 moving forward.

Will Dissly – 6 catches for 62 yards and his 3rd touchdown. I wrote about Dissly in my Fartgate post as well saying, “Dissly made the Steeler defense dizzy in week 2 as he broke out with 5 catches for 50 yards and 2 touchdowns. The 4th round pick out of Washington also caught two touchdowns in only four games during his rookie season last year. There’s a chance he blossoms into a top 10 tight end this season.” Yep, I’m back to quoting myself and Dissly is back to finding the end-zone. Make sure he’s owned in your league.

Cooper Kupp – 11 catches for 102 yards and his 1st and 2nd touchdowns. Cooper drank from the Kupp of glory on Sunday Night as Jared Goff (24/38 for 269 yards and 2 touchdowns ) quenched his thirst early and often feeding him 12 targets.

Demetrius Harris – 1 catch for 2 yards and his 1st touchdown. Chief David Njoku is on the shelf for awhile with a broken wrist and Harris is the next man up. He only needs to be considered in 2 tight end or tight end premium leagues for now.

Darrell Henderson – I have to take my lumps on this one. I was big on Henderson in the preseason due to the well publicized Todd Gurley (14 carries for 43 yards) knee issues. The Rams traded up to take Hendo in the 3rd round of this year’s draft so of course they’re going to use him, right? Wrong! He hasn’t even seen the field the past two weeks and Malcolm Brown (3 carries for 7 yards) has solidified himself as the number two option behind Gurley. I still expect Henderson’s day to come at some point this season, but unless your rosters are massive or you’re in a dynasty league, he can’t be owned right now. Stupid Donkey!

 

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Find Donkey Teeth on Twitter. Subscribe to his podcast: The Razzball Fantasy Football Podcast on Itunes, Stitcher, or wherever you get your podcasts.