Ambulance Chasers, Week 1: What You Need To Know

The kickoff to the regular season is fast approaching which means your Week 1 fantasy matchup is also just around the corner. Whether you’ve already drafted or your league waits until the last possible minute, there are key injuries you need to keep in mind when setting your lineups for Week 1 and thinking about your championship strategy. With that in mind, here are a few key players with injuries you’ll want to watch…

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Start ‘Em and Sit ‘Em, Week 1: Murray-Up Offense

by: Zach

latavius-murray

Football is back, and better than ever. After an offseason that felt like it lasted forever, we finally get to sit back, relax and enjoy some games that count. It seems like ages ago Cam Newton left his press conference. But here we are. For me, it means benching the wrong player at 12:59 pm. But (hopefully) you will not make any wrong decisions this year en route to that coveted fantasy title. It’s time to forget about 2015, and focus on the year ahead.

Although the mentality of Week 1 of the NFL Season in a fantasy sense means to just start the players that we drafted in order, this might not always be the case with a lot of fantasy teams. Especially for the owners that drafted Jamaal Charles in the 2nd-round. Players like Jameis Winston, Blake Bortles, Jeremy Hill, Adrian Peterson, DeMarco Murray, Mike Evans, and even Jarvis Landry all have either bad or less-than-ideal matchups to kick off the NFL season. I always advocate the strategy of “never bench your studs”, however, if we can definitely upgrade at a position to maximize the upside in our starting lineup, we should go for it. Simply put, Week 1 isn’t a guarantee.

Many teams enter Sunday with high hopes for the 2016 season. But one team in particular is looking to have a season like no other in the past few years. The Oakland Raiders enter the year with great young talent, veteran leadership where it matters the most, and to capitalize on a weakened division with play from their high-powered offense.

And their running back is at the forefront of it all. So let’s get to it…

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Deep Impact, Week 1: Braxton Can Un-Break Your Lineup

September 9, 2016 | 2016 Deep Leagues, 2016 Fantasy Football | 20 Comments

by: Alex Lee

Welcome to this week’s edition of “Dope Imports”, our regular series evaluating the foreign drug trade in the United States. This week, we’ll take a look at drugs coming from Mexico, and hoo boy folks that Donald Trump character may have a few good… *answers call from Jay* I’ve been informed that this will be yet another installment of Deep Impact, and also that I am a garbage human being. For those who haven’t been keeping up, this is the series for deep league players seeking fliers so far below the radar that LOOK OUT THEY FLEW RIGHT PAST YOU. Man, that was a close call. For those of you who have been reading, of course you have; look at how intelligent you are and how great you look in a bowtie. Why don’t you wear it more often?

As you’re aware if you live near a TV, computer, radio, newspaper stand, or town crier, Week 1 of the NFL season is upon us. Our previous editions of this series have focused on some players to target in deep formats. Now that the season is beginning, we’ll focus on two types of players: ones to consider playing this week that are very low owned (10% owned or less in Yahoo leagues), and players to consider stashing for later use (using the same 10% threshold). If you want standard league guidance for Week 1 streaming options refer to yesterday’s post by the Unbreakable MB, which had some quality players to choose from, including some below our threshold. Here, we’re going for the deepest cuts only. If you play in standard formats, I’d advise just keeping an eye on these guys for the time being. If you’re wading in deeper waters and have some early season injury issues or matchup concerns, get ready to take the plunge…

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2016 Razzball Dream League, Episode 2: Picking the Draft Order

September 9, 2016 | 2016 Dream League, 2016 Fantasy Football | 3 Comments

by: Keegan

We know you guys couldn’t wait any longer to see episode two of the Razzball Dream League, so here it is. We apologize for the delay. You can blame Sauce, who sent his video in eight years late, yet it’s still the worst quality video I have ever seen in my life. Is it that hard to take a video of your face? Tehol also screwed up the draft order because he forgot what number he was on, so typical. Speaking of typical, this is so rigged. Tehol, the commish picking the draft order, SOMEHOW ends up with the number one pick. He must have a bromance with Antonio Brown just like he does with Tyrod Taylor.

I don’t really have anything else to say here. Watch after the jump and comment below who you think will be crowned champion of this league!

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Graham Ganope

September 9, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 News & Notes | 72 Comments

by: Jay

ganope

Granted, there isn’t a rich history to draw from in terms of “quality football” on Thursdays, but you have to think that this being an actual Sunday Night production, coupled with the fact that we actually haven’t had a real game in what feels like decades, I’m pretty sure I would have been enamored if it was the Vikings playing against the Titans (which we’ll actually receive this Sunday! Wooo?). That being said, the game was actually pretty good on the scale of Graham Gano to those muscles in your arm that benefit the most if you’re throwing a penalty flag. (I mean, there were so many flags this game, it felt more like a United Nations summit, amirite?) Both teams looked sluggish throughout though, which was probably to be expected in the first game of the season. The Broncos and Panthers burned a lot of timeouts too, each for their own derpy reasons. For Denver, they seemingly forgot to count and had multiple downs where 12 men were on the field. For Carolina, five total timeouts from both halves were wasted because of terrible clock management by Newton (though I’m pretty sure Jerry Richardson was only upset with three-fifths of them). In fact, Andy Reid probably uploaded all these timeouts to his PornHUB account. That being said, I have to add that I found myself pretty frustrated with the continued non-calls on what were some brutal hits to Cam Newton. There were at least three blatant roughing the passer calls that were missed (or ignored?), and the last hit, late in the fourth quarter that actually drew a flag (you can see it after the jump), which was a helmet spear of all things, was offset by an intentional grounding. Oh, okay then, that makes sense. But the game was close throughout and quite entertaining, and due to the fact that Trevor Siemian flirted between the lines of profoundly mediocre and downright awful, the Panthers had a chance with seven seconds to win the game with a 44-yard field goal attempt in altitude… so yeah, we know how that turned out. Congrats to your 0-1 undefeated Panthers! Wait a second…

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Season Opener Live Thread: Panthers vs. Broncos

September 8, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 Game Day Live Thread | 78 Comments

by: Jay

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Sorry, drinking has already started because today is the day. Today is the day football starts! Yeah, I know that you know, but I wanted you to know that I know because I now know that you know. And that’s when my computer exploded. Regardless, not only does the debut of football bring us, you know, football, I also get to debut my beloved Live Game Day Threads. A place where we can hang out, enjoy some memes, discuss the games in front of us, and hopefully learn something. Like in this case, what a Siemian is and what it can do. To be honest, I could tell you better what it could do if one of those vowels were dropped. Like, any of them. But yes, if the GIF above or the just stated close-but-not-so-close sexual innuendo didn’t give it away (or even the title!), our first game of the year features two teams that have a long and storied rivalry dating back to… uh, well, one game. But, to be fair, that game was the Super Bowl (50, or as the Romans would say “L”), a game in which the Broncos defense carried Peyton Manning to another title so he could retire knowing he had one more ring than Tavaris Jackson. It’s important to have goals folks. And while I’m amazed that the NFC South was able to produce a team that actually knew what it was doing last year, an entire offseason has passed since these two franchises met. Will there be a different outcome? Well, unless they’ve figure out how to stop Von Miller, I doubt it… but to be fair, if I still have a Cam Newton combined with the return of Kelvin Benjamin led by the distinguished gentleman known as Riverboat Ro, alln going against a quarterback I hadn’t heard about until a week ago, I’d say your chances to win are preeeetty gooood. Sorry, I’m at the elongated vowels stage of alcohol poisoning…

Our Week 1 Rankings can be found here!

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I Scream and You Stream, Week 1: Try the Clam Crowder

September 8, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 Roster Strategy | 6 Comments

by: MB

giphy

It’s officially Week 1. We’ve finally made it and I can’t wait to ignore my fantasy baseball playoff matchups to solely focus on overreacting to Week 1 of the NFL. We are also coming off of a great weekend of college football. Depending on whom your team is: Congratulations, you guys are looking really solid this year. Or maybe, your team already showed their true colors in week one, crawl into a hole for the rest of the season, you make bad decisions while picking allegiances to college football teams.

Streaming can even be important in Week 1 matchups. Guys that we drafted whom we thought would be magically okay for week 1, after they get their legs ripped off last season, sometimes aren’t ready to go right away. Sometimes perceived studs don’t win the job right away and have to wait for a certain running back who has never done anything in the regular season to fail, again. Your sleeper quarterback could be facing a nightmare pass rush, you don’t invest in defenses so you stream on a weekly basis. This is what I am here for. Also, a couple weeks down the road, when I get a feel for the season, I will be adding droppable players into this article. Maybe it will help you decide who to get rid of to make room for these awesome streamers…

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By the Numbers, Week 1: Love Your Cousins

September 8, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 Roster Strategy | 20 Comments

by: Mike Honcho

Week 1 is upon us internet friends and that means real, live American Football! Let us rejoice. With that, it’s time to crush our opponents and begin the systematic take down of our fantasy leagues. The focus of this article each week is to bring you the best passing and rushing matchups along with a few interesting notes and stats pertaining to QBs, WRs, RBs & TEs. After you’ve processed the information you’ll be ready to make the right lineup decisions to help you win . As the season progresses, we’ll have a bigger sample of data to draw on. But for this week we’ll stick to some historical trends and numbers that will help us better identify the top plays of the week. So what I’m basically saying is…..This article will definitely dig deeper and be more complete as the season moves along. So without further hesitation, let’s dig into some numbers that might help you win your match up this week. But……before we dive in I should probably offer up some sort of lede which ties into the catchy title. Right? Okay, well Kirk “You Like That” Cousins has a delicious match up with the visiting Pittsburgh Steelers. Pittsburgh ranked 22nd in TDs allowed last season and 30th in passing yards allowed. That’s not optimal for a defense. In fact, that’s pretty close to orange cone level. Add those numbers to the fact that he’s at home this week (which we’ll talk about below) and you have yourself a QBILF!? Anyway, here’s a look at some other numbers to guide you through Week 1:

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Podcast: Preview of Week 1 with Bonus Production Value

September 8, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 Podcast, Fantasy Football Podcast | 49 Comments

by: Jay

Football is back, so naturally, that’s what we talked about in Episode 5 of the Razzball Football Podcast. Tehol and Zach joined me with special guest Ramona from SportsGalPal. And, as the title denotes, we did that with PRODUCTION VALUE. That was the theme of the night, because we had Tehol talking on the phone while driving, which is totally something we don’t condone. Zach eating his mic was a nice issue to have. And I left music on here and there because what do I know about closing windows and pressing buttons on my mouse? Hint? I. Don’t. Know. Much. Despite all this, we do get to every Week 1 matchup with some thoughts, pontifications some would say (probably just me), and predictions for you to consume. Hopefully with an alcoholic beverage. Or some tacos. I don’t know, spice up your experience man. SPICE IT UP. (Is that a saying?) Whatever, Episode 5 is after the jump!

Our Week 1 Rankings can be found here!

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Disgraces and Delights, Week 1: The Feasting of Tyrod Taylor

September 7, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 Weekly Rankings | 63 Comments

by: LT Murray IV

tyrod-taylor-bills

Greetings! To both my loyal subjects and sacrilegious haters, I humbly welcome you my life; ‘Tis true, my life revolves around the fascinating world of fantasy sports, but it’s so much deeper than that. Here, at the world’s finest fantasy sports website, Razzball, I’m able to share with you lessons of love and ecstasy, tales of heartbreak and betrayal, and possibly even some insight as to why Richard Gere enjoyed gerbils up his rectum. I cannot lie to you, my goodmen, my life is in absolute shambles right now. I cannot remember a time I felt so overwhelmed, yet I shall rise up and do my lordly duty, for I, Lord Beddict, am meant for greatness in some form or another and I shan’t be denied. WITNESS!

I am Tehol Beddict and this is Disgrace/Delight! Take Heed!

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The Handcuff Report, Week 1: Be aWare

September 7, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 Roster Strategy | 7 Comments

by: mikeMaher

Greetings and welcome to another NFL season and, more importantly, another Fantasy Football season. And even more importantly, welcome to the 2016 Razzball Handcuff Report! And despite the direction of the current NFL, we will not be tracking the players who get arrested every week or the players who Roger Goodell would like to put in handcuffs (hint: all of them). Instead, we will cover the best and worst handcuff options for fantasy football on a weekly basis… For the 2016 season, I, obviously, will be handling the Handcuff Report, which will be posted every Wednesday. For those of you who read my Frankencatcher articles over on the baseball side of things, this will be pretty similar. Also, to everyone who followed my advice and rolled with J.T. Realmuto this year, you’re welcome. I wish you the best of luck in your league’s playoffs.

So, first things first: what exactly is handcuff? For the fantasy football n00bs out there, or perhaps for those who have taken the last few years off, a handcuff is a backup who will likely take over as the starter in the event of an injury, extreme ineffectiveness, off-the-field trouble, or coach’s decision. There are probably other reasons that I am forgetting here, but those are the most common ones…

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Who Are These Guys?, Week 1: Ricky Vaughn? Willie Hayes?

September 7, 2016 | 2016 Buy/Sell, 2016 Fantasy Football | 7 Comments

by: malamoney

At this point if you are reading this post and you don’t instantly know who Ricky Vaughn and Willie Hayes are then you should probably just close your browser, punch yourself in the face and go watch Major League. Seriously, do you live under a rock? I guess that’s a rhetorical question since anyone that could answer should have already stopped reading. If you missed me telling you to close your browser then go back to the first sentence. Otherwise I’m guessing reading comprehension is just not your thing. If you’re still here because you’re being stubborn and refuse to leave, there’s not much I can do. But if you just want to find out what I’m going to say next, I can live with that. However, if you’re still here because you like listening to Brewers games on the radio so you can enjoy some Harry Doyle, then we’ve got something in common. Juuuuuust a bit outside!

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