Tragic news this week folks. No, I’m not talking about the Saquon Barkley injury. Days of Antonio Brown’s Life has been cancelled until further notice. Rumor has it AB let one rip right in the producers face and then grabbed the director’s dong before punting his helmet into the stands. I can neither confirm nor deny these rumors, but what I can confirm is that Days of Antonio Brown’s Life if on hiatus, maybe permanently. Let’s cross our fingers for Lifetime to swoop in and pick the show up but don’t hold your breath. On second thought, maybe you should hold your breath if Antonio Brown is anywhere in the vicinity!

RazzBowl on the other hand is far from cancelled. We finally have a little shake up at the top of the standings with Danny Kelly of The Ringer giving up the top spot after dominating weeks one and two. Our new leader is Michael Stepney of The Fantasy Authority, on the heels of massive weeks from Alvin Kamara, Phillip Lindsay, Dalvin Cook, Amari Cooper and Marvin Jones. A meager 24 points separate the top 5 teams with ya boy Donkey Teeth biding his time back in 67th place—out of 180.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It wasn’t well reported by the mainstream media, but prior to week one Mike Evans gave a sample of his secret family sausage recipe to Jameis Winston. When Winston inserted the mystery meat into his mouth, the funkiness he tasted was beyond words. Jameis was so offended by the foul tasting wiener, he vowed to look to Chris Godwin before Evans on every pass play for two weeks. Then, earlier this week Mike Evans tweaked the family sausage recipe and placed the new wiener into his quarterbacks’ hands. The fresh Evans man meat was so juicy and flavorful, Jameis was addicted!

Needless to say, Winston adjusted his game plan for week three targeting Mike Evans 15 times against the New York Giants. Evans turned those 15 targets into 8 catches for 190 yards and 3 touchdowns. That must have been some sausage! Anyway, here’s what else I saw in yesterday’s late games for fantasy football:

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If you’ve been living under Antonio Brown’s helmet for the last two months and are just hearing about the RazzBowl for the first time, welcome to the party! 39 fans are competing against 141 of the top fantasy football industry analysts in Razzball’s unique take on The NFFC’s Cutline Championship format: The RazzBowl (apply for RazzBowl 2020 here). It’s the biggest thing to happen to the fantasy football world since the invention of Rudy Gamble’s mind-blowing subscription tools, which can be tested out on a free one week trial right now!

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It’s no secret, Donkey likes em young. There’s just something about the trusting innocence in those big soft rookie eyes which can’t be matched by an old weathered veteran. And fantasy sports are all about having fun; what’s more fun than drafting the youngster your buddies have never heard of and watching the kid grow into a superstar on your fantasy team as your closest friend cries their self to sleep while clutching the last place penis trophy?

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I’m sure you’ve been wondering, “Why did Donkey Teeth retreat into solitude after executing such a flawless RazzBowl draft?”  The truth is, when you draft the most dominant RazzBowl team in the history of RazzBowl teams drafted by a Donkey hopped up on green juices and hallucinogens, withdrawal is unavoidable.

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The Senior Editor of Razzball Football, Matt Bowe (MB), joins Donkey Teeth and B_Don on this week’s Razzball Football Podcast, formerly know as the Fantasy Sausage Podcast, still known as two questionably straight dudes talking football. Off the top, the guys dissect MB’s RazzBowl draft and convince him it’s not THAT bad. They also discuss the crazy Game of Thrones themed guillotine league slow auction in which they’re all currently participating.

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Every third Thursday of November my herd gets together and we jam out to a variety of classic Michael Jackson tunes. My brother, Donkey Breath, can’t get enough Thriller; Pretty cliché, right? I’m always telling Breath he needs to dig a little further into The King of Pop’s repertoire. I myself prefer The Gloved One’s early years with The Jackson 5.

Jermaine, Jackie, Tito, Michael and their lesser known youngest brother, Lamar, composed some of the most dulcet melodies you’ll ever hear. Little Lamar couldn’t sing worth a donkey lick, but boy could he run! Many years later, the very same Lamar Jackson, who was definitely a member of the Jackson 5, has now been given the reigns to the Baltimore Ravens offense. Lamar has game changing speed and will be a threat to run for 100+ yards in every game. Add him immediately in all leagues if for no other reason than to keep him away from your opponents. Anyway, here’s some other players to buy or sell this week in fantasy football:

Please, blog, may I have some more?