obeck

An interesting factoid that you may not be aware of is that since 2009, Al Michaels and Cris Collinsworth have called exactly half of all the Giants vs. Cowboys games. Which essentially means that if you’ve watched Sunday Night Football since 2009, you also watched exactly half of all the Giants vs. Cowboys games. What can I say? Sometimes math is very kind to me. Granted, this math probably applies equally to any Cowboys/Eagles, Ravens/Steelers, and Manning/Brady games, with a few Pats/Colts and Seahawks/49ers match-ups thrown in, so what I’m basically saying I guess is that NBC loves ratings and schedules their games accordingly. This incredible deduction by yours truly may or may not have been because I’m a fan of BBC’s Sherlock… but it certainly didn’t hurt.

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Nike-signs-Jameis-Winston-Marcus-Mariota-Melvin-Gordon-and-Amari-Cooper

With the early slate of games nearly in the book, we can now turn our attention to the late games, where there are even more marquee match-ups featuring legendary players, long held rivalries, and the ultimate in what we know as professional football. And that’s just the Titans and Buccaneers game I’m talking about. Hyperbole aside, the game does feature an intriguing match-up between two rookie quarterbacks; Marcus Mariota and Jameis Winston.

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Someone give the guy a cigarette and get it over with…

So much gum chewing. Someone just give the guy a cigarette and get it over with…

The season is now in full swing, with the first Sunday of football for 2015 season bringing us a fantastic slate of games. Do you want action? Do you want drama? Do you want romance? I WANT ALL OF THESE THINGS. Well, then I present to you the Browns versus the Jets. Haha, just kidding… but this is Week 1… I wouldn’t have really minded that being the premier match-up… well, for at least a few minutes. Honestly, what can you say about Jets that would excite anyone? And what can you say about that Browns that hasn’t already been said about Iraq? Nada, to use a parlance of our times. But there are some actual marquee match-ups this Sunday morning, including, but not limited to the Bears hosting the Packers, the newly revamped Bills facing off against the Colts, and a battle of cats between the Panthers and Jaguars. Then there’s an interesting NFC West match-up involving the Seahawks and Rams, which I’m sure will include Pete Carroll smacking his jaw like a guy who just did coke after being clean for 20 years…

Our rankings have been updated for today’s games and can be found here.

New to Daily Fantasy Football? I am too! I’m trying out this new free FanDuel’s contest, where half the league is guaranteed to win. If you want, you can join up with me! (Played FanDuel before? You can build a team for $5 for a chance of $100,000, part of a one million dollar prize pool!)

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stats

A palindrome is a word, phrase, number, or other sequence of characters which reads the same backward or forward. Allowances may be made for adjustments to capital letters, punctuation, and word dividers.” – Wikipedia

The word “stats” is a palindrome. So are words like “kayak”, “level” and “radar”. How about “race car” or “top spot”. Even phrases such as “Madam I’m Adam” and “never odd or even” are palindromes. Why isn’t the word “palindrome” a palindrome? Shouldn’t they have picked a word that was? Palindrome spelled backwards spells “semordnilap”, which is apparently defined as a word that spells a different word when spelled backwards. Some examples include “stressed”, “war”, “evil”, “spoon” and even “sports”. But what if C-A-T really spelled dog?

So how does any of this help you with your fantasy football team? It doesn’t. However when I started writing this post and typed the word “stats” I realized for the first time that it was in fact a palindrome and felt compelled to mention it…

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Greetings! Totally awesome Thursday Night Football, right? A wretched performance by T-Pain, Bob Kraft’s trout-ass trotting around the field like a prized gelding, the Steelers headsets “malfunctioning”, and of course, GROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK, is all I really took away from a game that was missing what was basically every player I wanted to watch, due to a suspension for smoking that sticky icky. The game went pretty much as I expected, other than D’Angelo treating the Patriots run defense the way my favorite porn star and close friend, Mandingo, treats his co-stars. No sir, I am not sold on the Patriots being a contender this season. My apologies to the mass-holes, who verbally beat me like a piñata each and every day on Twitter for that epic Seattle Seahawks fail in the Super Bowl. Your time is coming. Oh yes, your time is coming (laughs maniacally while coating my naked body in Vaseline). But seriously though, who cares about real football!? This is a fantasy site, ya’ll! Communicating with the Elder Gods is a complicated and somewhat challenging affair; It involves an immense fire pit, sage brush, a quarter oz. of Peyote, a fifth of Everclear, animal sacrifice, and a bit of luck. Even when they accept my summons and pass the peace pipe with me, deciphering their language and riddles is a most difficult thing to accomplish, but I do my utmost, and that is all one can ask of a man such as myself. Below, is what the Elders have foretold for Week 1.

I am Tehol Beddict and this is Start ’em and Sit ’em. Take heed!

You can check out my rankings here, for all your roster needs…

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It’s crazy, right?  The NFL season is here.  Your drafts and auctions are done, so it’s just time to set your lineups for Week 1 with one game in the bag already in Foxboro.  I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling 22.  OKAY, enough Taylor Swift.  I don’t know about you, but I’m sad that draft season is over.  It’s by far my favorite time in the fantasy football season.  The mocks, the snake drafts, the slow-play drafts, the auctions, the scouting reports and all of the news leading up to the season can’t be matched.  Now, it’s time for luck to kick in and play the big part that it does each football season. Each week, I’ll be highlighting different streamers that fantasy players should look at for the upcoming week at quarterback, tight end, defense and kicker.  Obviously, some of the guys I write about won’t be available in your league.  We do all play in different league sizes and rules, after all.  So, if I write about Andy Dalton one week, just shoot me a comment below with your question and I’ll be more than happy to help there.

Let’s get things going, shall we?

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Well hello again friends and enemies.  We embark on another year of fantasy usefulness here at Razzball, and as always, I am here to shed a spotlight on something either obvious or not so obvious.  This week, the one obvious thing that I am going to point out to all of you is the match-up between the Eagles and the Falcons.  The game itself does nothing as a whole for us from a fantasy perspective, but the player I want to spotlight on is Leonard Hankerson.  Granted, Leo hasn’t ever really been in a keen quarterback situation, unless you count that half a year with RG-3.  He is not a possession receiver, nor a burner.  He’s just an ordinary guy. This week though, he has a chance to be something better.  He can be the WR3 we are all coveting for in Week 1 that a lot of people are sleeping on.  Wondering why?  Hell, I am too, but stick with me and I will steer you to Week one helpfulness as the lighthouse spotlight shines on the A-T-L…

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Don’t cover Gronk. What’s the worst he can do? - Keith Butler.

“Don’t cover Gronk. What’s the worst he can do?” – Keith Butler.

Even though the pregame show lasted about as long as a soccer game does (with all the appropriate New England circle-jerking, including, but definitely not limited to the Dropkick Murphies performing), we were soon allowed to settle in and watch the first game of the 2015 regular season. Right from the start, the Patriots offense seemed fueled by their overwhelming whiteness, as if Bill Belichick knew that I wanted to experience what it’s like to eat an entire box of saltines while stuck in traffic outside of Boise, Idaho inside a Ford Fiesta listening to the White Stripes. Speaking of Julian Edelman and Rob Gronkowski, I’d say (with my analytical prowess) they played a huge part of the Patriots eventual win. Well, almost as much as Josh Scobee (missing two field goals) and the Steelers secondary (who thought Gronk was overrated), both of which forced Mike Tomlin to go into his ‘Choke-A-B*itch” resting face for pretty much the entire night…

New to Daily Fantasy Football? I am too! I’m trying out this new free FanDuel’s contest, where half the league is guaranteed to win. If you want, you can join up with me! (Played FanDuel before? You can build a team for $5 for a chance of $100,000, part of a one million dollar prize pool!)

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Bradyface

Technically it’s Sunday Night Football on Thursday, but since that makes no sense whatsoever, I’m just going to call it what it is, and that’s Thursday Night Football (TNF). And since the Steelers are going against the Patriots, you could also probably call this stigmata as well. In a match-up I would call a “rambunctious” recreating of everything wrong with Afghanistan, the season opener begins on the laurels of a guy who is likely to force himself on your mom. And Ben Roethlisberger. I do want to mention that this game should have featured two former teammates going against each other in Le’Veon Bell and LeGarrette Blount, but both are missing time due to suspensions from marijuana-related offenses, so that idea kinda went up in smoke. A shame, as it was such a budding relationship too… Instead, we’ll once again have to deal with two quarterbacks we all love to hate, one with deflated balls and asterisks galore, and the other with a HARF HARF HARF take on life. And on sexual assault.

You can find Week 1 Rankings here.

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Welcome to the introductory edition of the Injury Report.  The Injury Report will be your chance to get caught up on the latest player injury news every Thursday throughout the NFL season.  (I would say “National Football League season” but I’m not a former National (w/emphasis and pause) Football (w/emphasis and pause) League (w/emphasis and pause) player.  The most basic component of the Injury Report will be a run down of all the newly injured players, a suggestion for their recovery time, quick updates on previously injured players and the NFL practice reports.  (I’ll be relying on all released reports via most media outlets for this portion of the post.) Some situations will require a more detailed analysis on what the injury means for the player and for the team.  That will give me a chance to go over who benefits from the injury and who, other than the injured player, loses out.  I’ll also be giving my thoughts on whether the injured player should be dropped or held onto through the injury. Another goal of the injury report will be to dig a little deeper, as in, deeper down the depth chart.  That means I’ll also be noting when that fourth wide receiver on the depth chart sustains an injury, for example.

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Ladies and Gentleman. Boys and Girls. It is almost Week 1 of the regular season, and I just cannot wait. Can you smell that? That smell of pigskin, the smell of 1,000+ calorie dishes? I have never been as ready as I am today. As I sat on my couch late Saturday night, watching my Wisconsin Badgers get taken to school by Alabama, I realized something. “Hey”, thought I. “Don’t you have an post to write about dealing with Week 1 DFS for Razzball?” Well yes, Zach, yes I do. So here I am. Seriously, I thought about something very interesting while watching ‘Bama-Wisconsin. Here is Wisconsin’s HB Corey Clement’s stat line on Saturday night.

Player Carries Yards Average TD Long
Corey Clement 8 16 2.0 0 5

Clement could not run the ball to save his life, and a result, it ended mine. The Alabama Defense was just too good, and as a result, Wisconsin had to throw the ball to stay in the game. Meanwhile, on the other side of the field, here is the stat line for Alabama HB Derrick Henry.

Player Carries Yards Average TD Long
Derrick Henry 13 147 11.3 3 56

Depressing. The defense was so great, that all the Crimson Tide had to do was run the ball. They didn’t need to throw the ball a lot, because their defense was so excellent. They were always ahead. The same happens in the NFL. When a team is down by multiple scores, they don’t have time to run the ball. They throw, and they throw some more. And when a team is straight out dominant, they run the ball to kill clock. Let’s face it, there’s stuff to do after the game. This key stat is important when playing any type of fantasy, DFS or season-long. Eli Manning is a great fantasy quarterback, because their defense is so awful, they throw the ball to stay in the game, instead of giving it to Rashad Jennings, who last year, averaged 58 yards a game.

So this week, consider this: Picking a running back who won’t run the ball a ton, due to the team playing from behind, isn’t a smart move. Picking a RB who has a great defense (playing against a weak offense), is a very smart move. A move that could result in six-figure winnings…

New to Daily Fantasy Football? Try out this new free FanDuel’s contest, where half the league is guaranteed to win. (Played on FanDuel before? You can build a team for $5 for a chance of $100,000, part of a one million dollar prize pool!)

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2014 Accuracy: 57.00% (3rd out of 20 Experts, Range: 58.40% – 48.10%).

After months and months of analysis, mock drafts, and ultimately the actual draft, it’s finally time to set your Week 1 lineup. There is nothing more alternately exciting and terrifying as having to make the choice between two players that you valued similarly at draft time. The rankings below will hopefully help make some of those choices, but given that this is the first week of actual football, the best plan is to keep things simple. Typically, the guy you drafted first is the guy you want to start this week. There will obviously be exceptions to that rule, mostly due to injuries or suspensions, but don’t overthink matchups at this point. Basing lineup decisions around matchups is difficult for IDPs in general, and even more so when all we have is training camp and preseason games to analyze. Instead, the goal is to simply get as many snaps for your guys as possible. I tend to play things safe in Week 1, going with someone I know will at least get me some points instead of a guy who could potentially throw up a goose egg and contribute to an 0-1 start…

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