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It's gonna be a long year for these Cowboys...

I have to admit, after including some thoughts on today’s remembrance in our earlier live thread, I think the pre-ceremonies around the league were handled pretty nicely for an event that will forever live in infamy. (Hey, if you’re going to quote someone, might as well be one of the best.) And speaking of the today’s earlier live thread, I would be remiss not to mention again that while I’m completely ecstatic that football has returned, and even doubly ecstatic (is that a thing?) that my Chargers are looking pretty good right now against the Chiefs, that for the general NFL fan, there really wasn’t any premiere matchups to open up the first Sunday of the regular season. No pizzazz. No jazz hands, if you will. And if you didn’t know, Football and jazz hands are like pees and carrots, Jet Li and Delroy Lindo, Tom Brady and uggs,… you get the point. But does the afternoon slate give us a bit more in terms of storylines and rivalries? I feel like it’s a resounding MAYBE. That’s how we do resounding here folks, all caps. Forget the Dolphins and Seahawks, or even the Lions and Colts, no, the focus should be on the NFC East matchup between the Giants and Cowboys. Romoless Cowboys, sure, but with all the derp you get from this division, you basically had me at “NFC Eeee”. Speak no further, I’M F*CKING IN. We’ll see the debut of Dax Prescott, Eli Manning consistently throwing it 10 feet away from Odell Beckham Jr. just to see what happens, and of course Troy Aikman and Joe Buck. The last one isn’t really a highlight, but more a cry for help. Or, you know, a reminder to use horse tranquilizers to get through it all…

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The kickoff to the regular season is fast approaching which means your Week 1 fantasy matchup is also just around the corner.  Whether you’ve already drafted or your league waits until the last possible minute, there are key injuries you need to keep in mind when setting your lineups for Week 1 and thinking about your championship strategy.  With that in mind, here are a few key players with injuries you’ll want to watch…

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As I write this, I am also preparing for my first fantasy draft of the season. I have been studying projections and ADPs, creating tiers and notes in the app I use to draft, and going over the different draft scenarios and strategies in my head. And there is one thing I keep coming back to when I start going over the different scenarios for quarterbacks: Ryan Tannehill is going to be a competent QB2 this year.

Before you make the gas face and move on to Googling pictures of Ryan Tannehill’s wife (no judgment here, Google knows):

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Or go back to mock drafting or whatever else you do with your life with only a week left until real football, hear me out. Ryan Tannehill is not an elite Quarterback. I am not going to try and convince you that he is or that you should make him your QB1. All I am saying is that, depending on how things fall for you in your draft, you could do worse than waiting for Tannehill in the later rounds. Stats, please!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Tony-Romo-Jay-Cutler

Welcome to one of our last strategy sessions of the preseason (I think it’s our last. Besides comparing our rankings with those of ESPN, Yahoo, and CBS… which isn’t really strategy as it is, “haha, look how funny they are at ranking things type of post”). This is probably the biggest draft week (and weekend) in Fantasy Football, and I’m sure there are plenty out there who either play in formats that either start two quarterbacks, or change their touchdown point value from four to six. And in that regard, I bring you a post that should kill two birds with one stone, because ef birds, but also look guys at my profound ability to both have amazing geometric awareness and mind-bending arm dexterity to actually kill a living animal that can fly by bouncing a stone off of both of them!

Want to take on Razzball writers and contributors in the great game of Fantasy Football? For Prizes? OH MY GOD YES. Where do you sign up? Great question! (Even though you didn’t technically ask. I mean, you might have, but I couldn’t hear you…) You can join here!

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I thoroughly enjoyed Alex Lee’s piece about Ezekiel Elliott a couple of days ago. Personally, I don’t have any issue with Elliott in the top ten, however I agree with Alex, it isn’t an ideal position for him to be in. In order to build the most ideal starting lineup, it’s probably wise for Elliott to be your early second round pick after getting a top-end WR1, which is possible in regards to current ADP. But I’d be remiss not to point out that Alex left out a crucial element about the Cowboys backfield as a whole, so I followed up with him…

“I like Dunbar as a deep sleeper option, especially in PPR. I agree that Elliott won’t have a Murray-like workload, I’d expect them to give some whole series to Morris and have Dunbar as a 3rd-down back out of the gate, with McFadden potentially being sidelined at the beginning of the season. He could take the first few weeks of the season to carve out a nice spot for himself as a Sproles-like weapon. If he does well with it early on, that would make it tough for Garrett to force him into a reduced role when DMC comes back. The problem is that McFadden is arguable a more complete player who is a competent receiver (he caught 40 balls last season), and if Dunbar doesn’t impress early on, the team probably wouldn’t hesitate to give his opportunities to McFadden or Elliott. He’s a risky play, but worth a late round stash to see how he looks coming off his knee injury and what kind of role the team has in store for him. He could pay big dividends, or be someone you drop quickly for the waiver wire darling du jour”.

Well, I guess I don’t have to write the article then. Way to go Alex. However, there are some other things I want to say and build off of, and it involves even more Lance Dunbar. So let’s get to it…

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romoinjury2016

Now that the weekend has ended and we’re that much closer to the start of the NFL season, one has to ask (especially Cowboys fans and Tony Romo fantasy owners): Can I get off this wild ride? No. No you may not is probably the answer. After Tony Romo took a hit from Seattle’s Cliff Avril during a benign slide this past Thursday, the chronological order of what then took place was as follows:

  • “Romo Back Throwing on the Sidelines.” [Source.]
  • “Romo talks about minor back injury, seems completely fine. No X-rays needed.” [Video.]
  • “Tony Romo had an MRI Friday and has a broken bone in his back.” [Source.]

Well, that certainly escalated quickly. Oh, and what’s that imaginary narrative voice used as a vehicle to add a nice flourish whilst moving to another but related point to what was just stated? There’s more…? Oh god…

  • “Romo to wear back brace. Garrett not ruling him out for week one.” [Source.]

LOL, Jason Garrett, never change my man. Anyhow, there are certainly some fantasy implications with such an injury, and to be completely frank, there are probably real life implications for your liver at the moment if you’ve ever found yourself residing in the Dallas area or if you’ve ever been afflicted at all by Romoliciousness (it’s a real thing, trust me). But let’s all be honest with ourselves at this present time… you’re used to it by now… right? I mean, you have to be.

So, the rankings have been updated already, but here’s how it all settled, at least until they install a robotic spine into Romo’s body and I have to change everything all over again…

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That time of year is quickly approaching when fantasy football fans everywhere will begin gearing up for the draft. Many players in 2015 started the season with such potential on the fantasy front, only to be sidelined with injuries that jeopardize fan standings around the country. Let’s take a look at some of the more notable injured players and how they look in their quest to return strong this coming season.

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2016 Rankings: Top-200 (Standard) | Top-200 (Half-PPR) | Top-200 (PPR) | QBRB (Standard) | RB (Half-PPR)RB (PPR) | WR (Standard) | WR (Half-PPR)WR (PPR) | TE (Standard) | TE (Half-PPR)TE (PPR) | K | DST

Dynasty Rankings: Top-150 | QB | RB | WR | TE | Top-50 Rookies

YearAccuracyRankHighLowPercentile
201557.5%22 out of 12359.9%51.6%Top 20%
201458.1%31 out of 12560.7%50.6%Top 25%

Welcome to the first installation of what is to be our 2016 Fantasy Football Rankings! It’s such a big deal, we have to capitalize the whole shebang. Just like your mother. Because, you know, shebangs. Regardless, as you can see right above my lovely remarks about your mother, we’ve had some pretty good success with our “ranking accuracy” the past couple of years. To be totally honest, the past two years, Razzball’s priority with rankings has been consistency, not necessarily a high-risk/high-reward strategy. And I think it shows and I think it’s the better path. Don’t worry, I’m patting myself on the back as I’m typing this, which you might thing is hard, but I’m pretty sure elbows weren’t really created for any other reason than to do this one thing. Any ways, now that the self-aggrandizing part is completed, I have to state, the quarterback position has gotten increasingly… meh. You have basically a mish-mash of top-5 or top-6 guys that you’d all be happy having, and then a whole bunch of interchangeable pieces until you get around to the point where it doesn’t matter anymore. I call that the Andy Dalton zone, or what is essentially the “gingerzone”. Which, come to think of it, would probably be a great 80’s hairband name. Regardless, here are your 2016 Quarterback Rankings, with the added bonus of Mark Sanchez. You know you want some of that nacho…

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Well we’re movin on up, to the east side. To a deluxe apartment in the sky. Movin on up to the east side. We finally got a piece of the pie. Fish don’t fry in the kitchen; Beans don’t burn on the grill. Took a whole lotta tryin’ just to get up that hill. Now we’re in the big leagues. Gettin’ our turn at bat. 

The player in this week’s Bear or Bull was stuck in the Pacific Northwest his first three years in the league. Stuck behind an All-Pro, he didn’t get a piece of the pie. Things got worse when he was cut then claimed by the Cleveland Browns, but now he’s moved east and finds himself in a great situation and may get his turn at bat. Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce you to Robert Turbin. While doing research on Turbin, I really gained an admiration for him. The Jefferson’s theme song really resonated with me when learning about Turbin’s past and personality. Here’s a brief synopsis:

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Not sure which one is winning the staring contest...

Not sure which one is winning the staring contest…

As we are just days away from Thanksgiving, the NFL Playoff picture is taking shape. (Just as your fantasy leagues move into the playoff portion of their respective schedules.) No team looks particularly dominant, even with two undeafted teams (the Panthers and Patriots) as near-locks to play in January. Each team has a particular set of weaknesses, weaknesses that they have acquired in the first 11 weeks, weaknesses that make it nightmare for all of us. Case in point, the Bengals losing to the Cardinals during Sunday Night Football… Cincinnati is the Enron of football; Promising start, get everyone invested early… and when they fold they leave a lot of people wondering what the f*ck just happened. The Falcons are part of the NFC South, relegating them to disappoint whenever possible, and the Vikings have had their issues (mainly everything on the offense that hasn’t abused a child) and the Giants and Bills will find a way to lose their next five games. I’m sure. The Broncos and Colts have quarterback issues, and the Packers and Steelers have interesting ways of defining “defense” and “play-calling”. That essentially leaves the Panthers (who calmly brushed Washington aside yesterday) as the most-likely strongest team going into the last few months of the season. An NFC South team making possibly going deep into the playoffs? What I time we live in folks. What. A. Time.

Here’s what else I saw during Week 11’s Sunday games…

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rodgersrain

It wasn’t that long ago when the Packers were an undefeated 6-0 and were on cruise control right into the playoffs. After losing three straight (and barely hanging onto a victory against my Chargers), the NFC North landscape has changed. Sorta. The Lions are still Lioning their way into their natural habitat of last place, and the Bears are continuing their time honored celebration of profound mediocrity. However, the Vikings (who were, at the beginning of the season, a potential dark-horse candidate) have quietly held onto first place of the division at 7-2. Much of that is due to the emergence of Stefon Diggs and the rejuvenation of Adrian Peterson’s career. I guess he just had to switch things up a bit to succeed. Today, we actually get to see a NFC North divisional match-up that isn’t your-run-of-the-mill of who are the Packers going to beat up now… Much has been said of Packers struggles, especially a missing Jordy Nelson. Who I guess just went on the IR? Or people just realized he was missing? Regardless, it seems as though they are just a one-dimensional offense at the moment, and that dimension is being eaten whole by Eddie Lacy…

Rankings have been updated and can be found here.

Join myself and your fellow readers in a special Razzball-only Contest! Buy-in is just $5.00 and the top-12 finishers in a 55-team league are all part of the prize pool! Sign up here!

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Several years ago while I was working on a project at work that required the crawling/scraping of blog sites, I came across a site called “the “blog” of “unnecessary” quotation marks”.  And it’s a hoot.  It’s basically people submitting photos of misused quotation marks, typically appearing on signs, to which the blog poster will comment with some “witty” quip.  You can read the site for ten minutes or two hours for the exact same effect because although it’s repetitive, it’s still quite an entertaining waste of time.  Read on for some unnecessary quotation marks of my own (along with some “completely” necessary ones, I promise), plus somewhere in here there will be a link to that blog, in case you want to check it out.  There may even be a questionable quote or two from a “source”.

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