I hate goodbyes. I hate when Sundays end. I hate when I hear Carrie Underwood singing “You’ve been waiting all week for Sunday Night.” No, not because she is hotter than I am, or I am jealous of her perfect legs. I hate it because Sunday night signifies the end of the weekend and the end of my fantasy football game. Okay, I am being melodramatic; I still have Monday night to watch football. But by the time Sunday night comes, I already know if I won or lost. And so of course, yesterday I already had that same feeling, and it wasn’t good. So let’s make it into a metaphor… it’s the “Sunday night” of the fantasy football season for many of us, where most of the football games are behind us, and we are holding on to the last two weeks of fantasy land, the Monday night of the season.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

This week is my week of regrets…. quarterbacks I regretted sitting, wide receivers I regretted dropping, running backs I regretted starting, teams I regretted rooting for, and Saturday… where I regretted drinking all night and failed to wake up before kick-off to lock my team in (at least the last one I have a decent excuse, it was my birthday Saturday). [Jay’s Note: Happy Birthday! If it helps, I’m still hung over from mine, and it was over two months ago…] I think one of the biggest regrets of mine is that all of this is happening during playoffs.

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At this point, you are either in your league’s playoffs, or you’re not…. You either won this week and secured your spot, or have already advanced to the second round. Or you completely lost, but you still care enough about Fantasy Football to keep reading. But I am assuming most of you are the “first ones”… ones that are still in the game and getting so close to the end (hopefully an end with money), that we cannot afford some fantasy blunders (like Drew Brees completely neglecting one of the top tight ends in the league. Jimmy Graham… seriously, not one freakin’ target!).

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Broncos, Broncos, Broncos (in my annoying Brady Bunch Marcia, Marcia, Marcia voice), once again top the fantasy football world. It has been 12 weeks of the NFL world revolving around Peyton Manning, and despite last week, the Broncos continue to score an absurd amount of points on the field and in the fantasy sector. The Dolphins did a decent job holding on, and I thought for a minute my home state’s team might take down America’s golden child.

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What if we just combined the two best apps in the world and made a Fantasy Tinder app, where I swipe left to get rid of a sucky player, then I swipe right for someone amazing (cough… Jonas Grey… cough), and Tinder does some magical thing where it aligns exactly who needs to be in my life with which players I liked. [Jay’s Note: So, I guess I know who Cam Newton will be matched up with then…] The Finder app (see what I did there?) would help fill up your empty fantasy tank with players from the waiver, and my team could survive.

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Holy Crap! Week 10 is already over, and I officially only have a guaranteed three weeks left with my team. I seriously hate good-byes, and I’m freaking out knowing I have such little time left with my team. Sure, I’m bias, but after ten weeks, you could say I am a tad connected to my team. And I am not afraid to say that this year’s team might be my favorite yet… Yeah, they piss me off some weeks, but for the majority of the weeks, they always make me proud. Thankfully for this week, they made me proud. (Do I sound crazy?)

I have to think a lot of ya’ll woke up this morning with the same pride (unless you suffered from the bye-weeks), because so many guys went off this week, and even the mediocre seemed to show up. Those of you who woke up really happy probably had Marshawn Lynch (40 freaking points in non-PPR leagues). It was nice to see a non-QB player go off and get so many points. His performance reminded me of Doug Martin, circa 2012, where his 50 something point game won the match-up for all his league owners. I feel like Lynch’s had to be the same for his owners. (Could anyone possibly lose if they started him?)

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Seriously, though… where are all the players going? It is like LOST has taken over fantasy football land, and all the players are disappearing between injuries and bye weeks. And, of course, this all happens at the most important time of the season when playoff brackets are starting to be established and records are changing in a flash. I have not felt victim to the missing player syndrome as of yet, but next week I know I will.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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After this week in the NFL, I feel like I might need to shed my old-school thinking that a quarterback is not worthy of a first-round draft pick in my fantasy football league. I always refuse to spend my first two picks on anything besides a running back or wide receiver (yes, I have never drafted Peyton.), but I always feel like I get a decent QB (usually Cam Newton and, you know, Cam Newton…) This week, I might adjust my mindset, especially after Newton’s week. Next year, you will see me spending my first round pick for Andrew Luck over LeSean McCoy every single time.

Please, blog, may I have some more?