Ladies and Gents, it has arrived. The inaugural season of The RazzBowl invitational is official open. Here is your shot to show us your fantasy prowess, your shot against other fantasy heads and fans of the industry. Can you take down the RazzGang? If you think you have what it takes, read more about it and sign up by clicking here.

Now, back to your regular scheduled programming…

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That is how I envision Nathan Peterman going out on Sunday will look like. It’s an embarrassment to football and modern civilization that he continues to get opportunities to start games in the National Football League. Where we all saw Nick Mullens last night destroy a Raiders team that is actually an abomination, it will be a real contest to see if Peterman can do worse. Let’s look at some of the key games for fantasy this week…

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Is it not the most awkward damn trolley you’ve ever seen? That it will be on display in Buffalo of all places with a decent chance of vandalism in the forecast for it only makes me more excited for the Pats blowout of the Bills on MNF. While Booger rails against logic and analytics throughout the broadcast and Jason Witten bumbles through introductory 3rd grade math, there is a non-0% chance a member of the #BillsMafia will make a leap of faith from the stands onto the #BoogerMobile. But before that game takes place, there are a couple from the Sunday slate that are worth looking at.

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As we mark the halfway point of the NFL season, many fantasy football outlets are performing mid-year reviews. While reflecting on early season analysis can be beneficial, I know you are more concerned about who to start this week for your starter that is on bye and what is going on with the multiple backfield injuries. This is what I am here to give you…

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Absconding in solitude to a Southern Colorado cave for the past two weeks, I pondered the universe, those delicious Totino’s pizza rolls, and of course, the next great buy for your fantasy football team. Entranced in the depths of transcendental meditation that would make The Buddha blush, two syllables appeared in the ether over and over. Tre – Quan, Tre – Quan, Tre – Quan. The universe has spoken and Tre’Quan Smith must be acquired at once. The third round rookie out of Central Florida is a WR4 for now, but top 20 WR numbers for the rest of this season are well within the realm of possibilities with Ted Ginn out for the year. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy football:

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While it is true that you cannot spell ‘elite’ without ‘eli’, we all know that Eli Manning is NOT elite. That was just atrocious to watch on a Thursday night. Pat Shurmur looked like he was going to kill somebody when Eli kept checking down to RB’s. But let’s move away from that atrocity of a game and focus on 4 games with some big fantasy implications this week…

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Back in kindergarten I was a real ladies donkey. All the other little donkeys were worried about catching cooties, but not ole Donkey Teeth. Your boy was busy scheduling play dates with all the kindergarten hotties; there was little time to worry about contracting the cooties, in fact, Donkey Teeth wanted those cooties.

Fast forward a quarter century, and while it seems my prowess with the ladies may have peaked a little early, I’m still trying to catch all the cooties I can: Keke Coutee that is (proper pronunciation is cue-Tee, but cut me a little slack). Coutee, the fourth round rookie out of Texas Tech, set a modern day record with 11 catches in his debut this week. Will Fuller’s hamstrings are literally held together by black forest ham and some strings; if Fuller misses more time, Coutee could be in for some monster weeks. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy football:
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After dropping 32 on New England, Blake Bortles (@ KC) responded the next week with a turd against Tennessee before bouncing back for 23 points against the Jets. Week 5 sees Bortles heading to Kansas City to face the Chiefs who allowed 3 passing TDs a piece in weeks 1 & 2, 2 TD passes in week 3 — and as I’m writing this they’ve held Case Keenum off the board. Blake Bortles is better than anyone gives him credit for — well — he’s at least better than Case Keenum…

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Peyton Barber is in the midst of another pathetic game as I’m writing this. He’s at 8 rushing attempts for 33 yards and I don’t see that number growing more than that. If the Buccaneers are serious about winning they’ll release their rookie RB Ronald Jones on the league for week 4. Either way — he’ll make his debut soon and have no one in his way from quickly gaining RB1 status. He’s currently unowned in about 80% of leagues, but smart owners (that’s you!) will start sitting on him now to reap the benefits later.

Please, blog, may I have some more?