It’s the age old question. Pondered by all the great philosophers for millennia. Debated by all great leaders and all feared dictators since the beginning of time. Beard or mustache? Abe Lincoln or Tom Selleck? Grizzly Adams or Groucho Marx? Gandalf or Ron Swanson? Merlin or Ron Burgundy? This enigmatic dispute has built for ages with no sign of a clear answer. That is, until Thursday night’s legendary culmination of Ryan Fitzpatrick vs. Gardner Minshew: a Beard vs. Mustache rumpus to rule them all. And it was nothing but beard in this one as Ryan Fitzpatrick flashed his facial prowess at a clip of 18/20 for 160 yards, 7 carries for 38 yards and 2 passing touchdowns—he now has 4 touchdowns on the season. The virtual fan chants for Tua and his baby face goatee will have to wait another week.  Many will question whether this was a valid win for the beard crowd, citing the illegal use of Fitzmagic in this contest—and rightfully so. Unfortunately, we may never have a definitive answer to the greatest question in the history of mankind. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday for fantasy football:

James Robinson – 11 carries for 46 yards, 6 catches for 83 yards and his 2nd and 3rd touchdowns. Jim-Rob Cooter was the loan bright spot for a Jaguar team that looked way more like prey than predator. Pigskinonator had an inkling that this outburst was coming as it projected Robinson as it’s #12 RB this week between slop servings. A friend in my home league (standard scoring with only 2 WRs) traded Terry McLaurin for Robinson yesterday, which seemed like a bit of an overpay at the time. Suddenly it looks like he may have snagged a bit of a Jim-Rob bargain. 

Gardner Minshew – 30/42 for 275 yards, 3 carries for 22 yards, 1 interception and 1 fumble lost. We all know mustache rides don’t last forever. That said, the Jags didn’t do Uncle Rico any favors in this one. Chris Conley (3 catches for 34 yards) looked like he’d been paid off by Slippin’ Jimmy to throw the game, the refs ejected their starting left tackle for no-good reason and the Dolphins defense without their top corner looked like world beaters. I’m writing this off as a let-down game after Jacksonville upset the Colts in week 1 and almost knocked off the formidable Titans in week 2. There’s happier mustache rides ahead, float a buy-low offer out there if you’re in a superflex league. Speaking of trading, check out our Free Trade Analyzer to assist in ripping off your buddies or in making a fair and reasonable deal, whichever you prefer.

Keelan Cole – 4 catches for 43 yards. When D.J. Chark (chest/back) was ruled out Thursday afternoon, the fantasy world was abuzz with Hype for Keelan who saw 7 targets last week with Chark playing. Surprisingly he only saw 5 targets in this one and was invisible for the entire first half. As punishment for his disappointing performance Cole now has to live in Jacksonville for another year.

Laviska Shenault Jr. – 5 catches for 33 yards, 1 carry for 1 yard. As a sexy rookie, Shenault received even more hype than Cole on the Thursday afternoon Chark news. I get it, he’s fun to dream on and shiny-shiny. And it should happen for the kid at some point. Viska’s worth an add in most leagues if he gets dumped after this disappointment.

Myles Gaskin – 22 carries for 66 yards, 5 catches for 29 yards. The final stat line of 95 total yards on 27 touches doesn’t do Gaskin justice. He looked quick, agile, even explosive at times. It’s no wonder he’s vaulted Myles ahead of the Matt Breida (3 carries for 4 yards) and Jordan Howard in the Dolphins backfield. Make sure Gaskin is owned in your league.

Jordan Howard – 3 carries for 1 yard and his 3rd touchdown. This was an impressive demonstration by the Dolphins front office on how to light 10 million dollars on fire—giving the Bears front office a run for their money, which is also on fire. Respect to Brian Flores and the Dolphins coaching staff for not wasting time in making the move to Gaskin—maybe he’ll even start to see some goal line work moving forward. Drop Howard if you haven’t already.

DeVante Parker – 5 catches for 69 yards. Nice. The game script wasn’t ideal for the Dolphins pass game fantasy weapons as Miami moved the ball at will, played from ahead and controlled the clock the entire game. I wouldn’t jump to any conclusions based on this game which will likely end up as a big outlier. 

Preston Williams – 2 catches for 7 yards and his 1st touchdown. Saucy Boi! Unfortunately he only saw 2 targets as the Dolphins ran the clock out in the 2nd half. I’m tripling down on P-Willy, there’s some big games on the way.

Mike Gesicki – 1 catch for 15 yards and his 2nd touchdown. Just to hammer the point home: Fitzpatrick threw the ball 30 times in week one and 47 times in week 2. Over his final 11 starts in 2019, Fitz had 33+ pass attempts in all 11 games. He had only 20 pass attempts on Thursday night. Expect much more consistent target volume for Parker, Preston and Gesicki moving forward. Gesicki has a good chance to finish the season as a top 10 TE. 

  1. Jimmy Jack James says:
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    I’m sitting at 2-0 in my half-PPR and the Saquon owner offered up Godwin for Gurley/Marv Jones. My RBs/WRs are as follows:

    RB – Jacobs, Gurley, David Johnson, A.Gibson, J.Robinson, Mike Davis, Damien Harris
    WR – Slayton, Gallup, Marv Jones, Aiyuk, Shenault

    Pull the trig trig or hold steady?

    Thanks for the content!

    • Earl says:
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      I would as think you need WR help and not so much at rb.

    • Mordacious Levator says:
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      id do that one, you have the rb depth

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Nice! Yep, I’d do that deal for Godwin.
      No problem!

  2. DougB says:
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    Aikman commented a few times on Devante Parker looking slow & being unable to separate. Hopefully in 2-3 weeks if his hamstring stays healthy he can get back to his big play explosive self.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Parker also had Xavien Howard on him. Yesterday is probably indicative of his floor as long as he can stay on the field.

      Edit: CJ Henderson, not Xavien Howard

      • goodfold2 says:
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        parker only can play howard at practice, hehe.

        • Donkey Teeth

          Donkey Teeth says:
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          Derp. That’s what happens when I start thinking too early in the morning.

  3. BallsDeep says:
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    I’ve got CMC on IR. Currently have Fournette and miles Sanders as my 2 starting RB’s. Godwin and DK as my WR’s. Are you starting Keenan Allen or Joshua Kelley in the FLEX spot? Or starting Joshua Kelley over Fournette?

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      I’d go with Joshua Kelley and Keenan Allen if it’s PPR. Kelley and Fournette if it’s standard.

  4. Earl Dietrich says:
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    Hey Donkey,

    What do you make of James Robinson especially for dynasty league?

    Funny about your write up but I offered a guy McLaurin for Robinson and he rejected it. Countered with Terry and 1st round for his JRob; which I think is insane.

    Thanks

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Hey Earl,

      I prefer Terry in dynasty by a bit, so Terry and a 1st does seem a little nutty to me. I’d guess there will be better opportunities to buy Robinson in the coming weeks, no sense chasing.

      No problem.

  5. Let Us Now Praise Famous Death Dwarves says:
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    i was about to say you might want to start throwing darts on those betting picks; instead i will pick along with you by rolling a die (sometimes i’ll actually like a side in addition)

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Ha! Yeah not great! I haven’t been crazy about any of these Thursday games so far, hence the 1 unit.

      Odds are I’ll hit one eventually!

  6. Zandy says:
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    Drop Corey Davis for Jeff Wilson?

    Godwin MThomas
    Taylor Fournette
    KAllen
    BN: MDavis, Dobbins, Bell, Kelley, Lindsay, CDavis

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      I’m not really into Wilson but Rudy and Pigskinonator seem to like him. He’s not a bad dart throw but I’d rather just keep Davis. Think I’d also start Kelley over Fournette this week FWIW.

  7. Ludicrous Speed says:
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    Pls rank these RB’s for ROS half-ppr:
    Moss, Dobbins, Akers, Swift, D. Lewis

    And how much faab ($100 budget) would you spend on the top 2?
    Thx!

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Dobbins, Moss, Akers, Swift, Lewis

      FAAB is tricky without knowing how many teams and roster size. You know your league best. If it’s a 12-teamer I’d honestly consider spending all of my FAAB on Dobbins, I like him that much. But maybe 40-50% gets the job done if those other guys are not he wire too…

      Moss, Akers and Swift are all pretty close for me so maybe toss $11-12 on each of them and see which one you come away with?

      No problem!

  8. Dominic Brady says:
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    Someone in my fantasy league dropped Raheem Mostert. Would you drop someone for him and if so would you drop JK Dobbins or Antonio Gibson. My other RBs are Zeke, Mixon, and David Johnson. This is 12 man PPR.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Wow, tough choice. Do you have any WRs, TEs or anything else you could drop? All these players need to be owned…

      • Dominic Brady says:
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        The league actually puts a cap on RBs. At 5. Which do you think would be the best option?

        • Donkey Teeth

          Donkey Teeth says:
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          Ahhh tough. I think I’d just stick with who you have for now and if he’s still available after this week then reassess.

          • Dominic Brady says:
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            Ok sounds good. Thanks!

            • Donkey Teeth

              Donkey Teeth says:
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              No problem!

  9. Sal says:
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    I traded e sanders and a pick next year for kupp and a pick. I gave the better pick. Good choice? I know both are off to a slow start but I figure kupp would have a stronger season

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Great move!

  10. Roots says:
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    Is Robinson a hold or sell high candidate? Competitive 16 team ppr keeper/punishment league. He would be extremely valuable if he we’re really this good moving forward. 10th round keeper value. Could possibly move him for a stud WR, Jones/Hill? Or even a Mixon? My heart and gut says hold. I’m going for the three-Pete…current roster is Cam, J. Taylor, D. Johnson, ARob, Parker, Gesicki, J. Robinson…with Crappy Depth. Thoughts?

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Generally I’d say he’s a hold but if you could get Hill I think I’d pull the trigger on that. That said, I always recommend going with your gut. Do you only start 2 wide receivers?

      • Roots says:
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        Yeah we only start 2. I’m content with ARob and Parker.

        • Donkey Teeth

          Donkey Teeth says:
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          Yeah, makes sense

  11. Last one out of liberty city says:
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    I’m in a dynasty .5 point ppr where we keep 4. Would you trade Julio and Freeman for Russell Wilson, ODB and McLaurin ?

    Thanks

    My roster is
    Qb – brees/ stafford
    RB – Zeke
    RB – Aaron Jones
    Wr – Julio
    Wr – devante Parker
    Te – kittle

    Bench – josh Kelly, Zach moss, Freeman, cooks

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Yes, I like that deal a lot for you

  12. Russowl says:
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    10 team non ppr 10 point bonus @ 100 rushing or receiving yards

    If Julio plays would you play him or any of the following?also If he doesn’t which one to start ?

    A.Gibson
    M.Davis
    J.McKinnon

    Thanks again

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      I’d start Gibson regardless, concerned that if Julio plays he could just be a decoy…we’ve seen it before.

      • Russowl says:
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        Thanks I was thinking the same

        • Donkey Teeth

          Donkey Teeth says:
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          Sure, no problem

  13. Shopgurrrl says:
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    In what order would you start the following defenses this week?

    -Football Team (vs. Browns)
    -Browns (vs. Football Team)
    -Chargers (vs. Panthers)

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Chargers, Browns, Football team

  14. Russowl says:
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    Just curious you recommended to start Gibson over McKinnon but have McKinnon 4 spots higher in weekly rankings?

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      I should make a note…check out the half PPR tab. Those are the rankings that I populate and then fantasypros has an algorithm that adjusts them for the standard and full PPR tabs. I don’t necessarily agree with their algorithm all the time, so always feel free to ask on standard and full PPR questions.

      As for Gibson and McKinnon, I have them neck and neck in all formats. Pretty much a coin flip to me this week but I lean Gibson. Rudy and pigskinonator like Jeff Wilson fwiw. I’m not on that bandwagon…

      • Russowl says:
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        Thanks for the explanation donkey teeth keep up the good work

        • Donkey Teeth

          Donkey Teeth says:
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          No problem, appreciate you reading

  15. hamtime says:
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    14m league

    1. would you bench hollywood (tough matchup) or julio (hammy) this week and start mike davis
    2. is tre’quan droppable after this week? looking for a more ROS WR. is this hamler or cobb?

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      1. I’d bench Julio
      2. Maybe. Interested to see if Sanders is a bigger factor this week. Also no guarantee that Michael Thomas is back next week. Hamler over Cobb for me.

      • Hamtime says:
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        Thanks! Noted on Julio (just got spooked w the questionable tag) but actually meant David Johnson (not Hollywood).

        Last before I fire my lineups:
        1. David Johnson or mike Davis
        2. Waller or Logan Thomas

        I ended up dropping tre smith w the notion that Thomas is back next week..

        • Donkey Teeth

          Donkey Teeth says:
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          No problem!
          1. DJ
          2. Waller

  16. JC says:
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    Standard league scoring:

    1. Montgomery orJelley?
    2. Slayton or Lazard?

    Thanks!

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      I’d go Monty and Lazard.

      No problem!

      • JC says:
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        Supposed to be Kelley but I can’t type. Sorry

        • Donkey Teeth

          Donkey Teeth says:
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          Ha yeah I figured out who you meant

  17. For An Armenianless Vacation Come to Akron says:
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    this is what i meant earlier when i said i couldn’t believe the FP (even the top ones) put LAR even top 15 this week. they were a 12th overall by FO, playing 3 time zones east, against a team that’s put up all sorts of points so far. even WITH the idea that j.allen would probably throw pick(s) it still looked quite bad.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Yup

    • For An Armenianless Vacation Come to Akron says:
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      and good god is the NYG offense bad. SF is missing one of their top CB’s and about their entire D-line.

      • Donkey Teeth

        Donkey Teeth says:
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        Maybe they’ll get something going in the 2nd half. Thought the giants might win this one…

        • For An Armenianless Vacation Come to Akron says:
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          yeah i’d have believed that too pregame, SF’s offense is mostly hurt and entire D-line hurt and 3 time zones east.

          • For An Armenianless Vacation Come to Akron says:
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            holy crap, ATL now going to probably have like 3/7th or something of the worst “run the clock out, badly” since that NE/ATL super bowl. man that team is ran badly.

            • Donkey Teeth

              Donkey Teeth says:
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              Hilarious

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